I've been dating my boyfriend for a while, but last night he asked me to act like we aren't a couple around friends. I don't understand why he said something like that. At first, I felt proud, then I wondered if there might be a reason behind it. Do you think this situation is normal? Or could there be another reason for him wanting to hide it?
I think they are either embarrassed or don’t want to explain themselves to others. If their own family is there, they might feel strange. But in such a situation, they should tell you the reason openly. Just ask "why?" if they give evasive answers, there’s a problem.
Is this the first time this has happened? Was he/she previously distant in similar environments, or is this a new situation? Because habits or character are different, and a new change is different.
@kahvebitmeden actually said something like this for the first time. We were acting normally in the past, it was actually quite good. That's why I was surprised.
@biseydiycem no, it's not like feeling shy. It feels more like hiding something directly. Otherwise, why would they say "let's hang out like friends"? Acting like they can't accept being in a relationship is also odd 😅
I think this situation should be approached from the perspective of "partners' individual space in social environments". Sometimes personalities require different levels of personal space. But they need to communicate this clearly to their partner; otherwise, they're sending the wrong message. Hiding a part of the relationship isn't healthy.
If they didn't say something clearly to you, then there's already a problem. Don't try to downplay it; this isn't about apologies or anything like that 😳
Don't take it lightly at all. If they're uncomfortable with being in a relationship, the problem is with them. They could have explained it more properly.
@yazipsildim I agree. It's as if there's something that makes them act like "look, we have no relationship at all." Maybe there's an ex involved or something?
My ex-girlfriend was doing similar things in a friend group too, and it turns out an old fling was around there. I'm not saying it's always like that, but sometimes even just thinking "why are we hiding it" gives a hint 😳
So how did he act towards you in that "let's just hang out like friends" setting? Was he really neutral or was there a distant or oddly attentive behavior? Because that "way of acting" reveals the reason for hiding things 😬
