My partner asked me for a loan of 5,000 TL the other day, saying, "It's an emergency, I'll definitely pay you back next week." But honestly, I'm a bit uneasy. They had mentioned before that they had supported their family a lot, but do they really need that much money, or are they just taking advantage of me? Should I lend it to them, or am I being too questioning and hurtful?
I gave my boyfriend 3,000 TL before, but the "one week" he mentioned turned into several months, and it eventually led to an argument. If it's someone you don't know very well, you really need to think seriously about trust.
I personally ask myself, 'How would I feel if the money I lent someone doesn't come back?' If you can accept it, then lend it; but if you think you'll regret it, don't take the risk at all.
When he says, "It's hard to explain to you," he's leaving an open door. I mean, why should it be hard to explain? After all, you're his girlfriend; he could speak more clearly. I think you're also entitled to question him a bit 🙄
A debt relationship can make a love relationship risky. If money doesn't come back, trust can be shaken, and your support may become routine instead of talking to someone else. In such situations, it's important to set boundaries.
Thanks for the feedback. I'd like to add that we actually haven't had much talk about money between us. I feel odd since it's the first time he's asked. I mean, he would always say he helps his family but we hadn't discussed the amounts 🙄
So, is there still tension between him and his family? Have you talked about this at all? Maybe if there's something genuinely coming from there, he might not want to share it with you for that reason.
Just say it directly. Try saying something like, 'I can't help you right now, but let's find another solution together, and if necessary, let's reach out to someone in your family.'
Will everything be okay just because we call each other "dear"? Some comments are really strange. The lender will need to follow up on what they are owed. You can speak openly without hurting anyone; pushing this hard is pointless.
'When he said, 'I'll definitely deliver it next week,' that's when things become suspicious. They kept stalling me for weeks saying, 'let these things finish,' so I would be careful.
