My fiancé and I keep our savings in a joint account, but we decided to separate our gold since I thought it might prevent problems later on. When my mother-in-law found out, she said something like ‘If marriage isn’t about trust, then what is it?’ Honestly, I didn’t do it with bad intentions, but does this decision make us look bad? Or is everyone’s plan what really matters?
6 Answers
6I think you’re right, it’s normal for everyone to make their plans accordingly. But what did your fiancé say about this exactly? Even if they agreed at first, let’s hope there won’t be any issues later due to family influence.
Honestly, I found the mother-in-law’s comment quite heavy too. I mean, is trust only going to come from the gold? It’s very sensible to keep things separate, because after all, you never know what will happen in marriage 
But if you aren’t sharing the gold, why are you pooling the savings for the engagement? It seems like there’s a contradiction somewhere. What your mother-in-law said makes sense from that perspective.
The main topic here is actually financial planning. Many couples manage their money separately before getting married or make prenuptial agreements. This doesn’t mean that anyone has bad intentions. However, if you clearly express why you are separating it to manage the family’s sensitivities, the crisis might ease a little.
Yes, I left this out here. Actually, I talked to my fiancée about it, and she found it reasonable too, but I think it’s her job to explain this to her family. Now there’s a silence between us, she seems a bit sad.
What kind of logic is this, are they just going to sit in silence because they might talk to their own mother? It seriously seems like they’re undecided from the start. They need to support you since this decision was already made together 