Last week at the family gathering, it hurt to see everyone laughing while my spouse made jokes about me. I felt like I wasn’t being taken seriously, and that really wounded me. What should I do? I tried to brush off the situation with humor, but something inside me broke.
I sometimes joke around with my spouse, making subtle digs, and it seemed like it had almost become a habit. In the end, I had to sit down and have a serious talk. I clearly said that if this continues, I would start to become distant, and it seemed to work. I think you need to be direct until they understand. I believe you should talk to your spouse; these things can't be solved by bottling them up.
Is this the first time? Does he always pull down like this through jokes, or did he exaggerate that day? Because if it's something that happens constantly, it's not a joke, it's clear manipulation 🙄
@camkenari it actually happened a few more times, but this is the first time it was so openly like this in such a crowded place. The previous ones were minor.
@makarnaoncesi you said to talk seriously, but not everyone can speak so openly and clearly. I think it's excessive to make a big deal out of it if the guy said he was joking. Maybe he didn’t mean it in a bad way.
@soncaykaldi the important point here is to clearly express how these jokes make you feel and to receive a reaction. Even if the joke isn't mean-spirited, if it upsets you, your partner should take that into account. These kinds of communication problems can lead to bigger issues over time. If you want, you could consider seeing a family therapist together.
It seems like something is missing on the topic. When you say family meeting, who was present? I mean, was it just the core group like mom and dad, or a wider relatives gathering? Because being embarrassed in front of everyone is one thing, but feeling irritated in a close setting is another 🤷♀️
I wouldn't have cared this much.
