Lately, my family has started pressuring me to get married. It feels too early for me, but they keep bringing it up. What can I say to them? I still feel like I'm not ready.
I know pressure well. When I was 28, my mom was running around the house saying 'where are the grandchildren'. Even so, I ran out of breath trying to explain things until I got married. Just keep talking calmly; they won't give up, but they will get tired 🤭
How old are you and do you live with your family financially? Some pressures are directly related to this, after all.
@yazipsildim I'm 26 years old. I'm still with my family because I couldn't move due to work. But I have my economic independence.
@bugun_degil the part about not giving up is wrong. I have a friend who resisted until he was 39 and still listens to the same chats. People’s patience can really be endless.
Although Ailen respects your decisions, sometimes they see expressing their concerns as a right. It might be helpful to show that your decisions are clear without turning to discussion on the topics. However, you should also consider the idea of moving, as distance can sometimes be effective.
I guess this topic will never change.
to be honest, parents are written off as very unjust in this title, but when you put yourself in their shoes, I also understand the fear of loneliness. Finding a middle ground is tough 😅
@soncaykaldi I don't think distance is the solution. You end up waiting for them to call and ask, and when you do ask, the topic comes back around to that. Changing family dynamics is hard 🫢
If the pressure is upsetting, you'll need to set distance either by talking or physically; there’s no other way.
Families generally view the matter of marriage as their own "success stories." They are after gaining social standing through you, not considering the individual. For instance, if you were to reasonably say, "I am happy this way," do they take it seriously? Or do they pretend to listen and just revert back to the same refrain?
