Last week, my mom asked how much my fiancé earns. To be honest, this topic is very sensitive for me, and hearing such questions from my family stresses me out. So we are engaged, our relationship is solid, but why is my family getting involved in something like this? How can I overcome this situation?
My mom had a similar situation where she kept asking my sister's husband how much money he brought home. I swear it stressed us out a lot; in the end, my sister straight up said, 'I don't know, I don't want to know,' and that put an end to it.
Marriage is near, so I think these questions are normal. It's your right to know the salary as well; after all, your family didn't ask with bad intentions.
Where is it normal? Why are they invading people's private lives? Just because marriage is near, we don't need to know anyone's income.
I think it's important to be clear on that issue. If your family talks about these things a lot, make an explanation between you and your fiancé so that there are no misunderstandings. You don't want to be caught in the middle later. 🙄
Has Ailen met her fiancé before? I wonder if they are asking who covers the expenses more in the relationship?
@pazardandondum yes, they have seen my fiancé a few times, but there was never any discussion about money. My mom asked such an open question for the first time about this.
@hatconene I think you're a bit harsh, after all it's a matter of marriage. I also understand those who say it's understandable.
They are either very curious or they want to check, there’s no other explanation.
you don’t say such things to family
The question is this: what will they do once they know the salary? Will they make plans or will they try to guide you? Why is this information important?
Did you ask why she needs it? Maybe she has something in mind but is approaching it the wrong way. You need to be open about this, or it could create a rift between you and your fiancé.
This salary issue sometimes stems from the curiosity of whether you're "earning more than you think, or less?" Your mother seems to have a concern about "finding balance." Maybe she views you and your fiancé as equals, is that her issue?
