My closest coworker has surpassed me

I've experienced something similar. I was overly ambitious; everyone noticed, but someone else stood out. I learned that things were happening behind the scenes. I didn't speak up to avoid conflict with the manager, and you know, I stagnated for years.

You mentioned having coffee with the manager; what other kinds of friendships are there? Did you see or hear something else, or was it just about the coffee?

@yazipsildim there’s nothing special besides the coffee, but they’re always side by side, always chatting about something. I never had a conversation like that.

@camkenari you say you were ambitious but you stayed silent. I think that’s a big mistake. If you don't stand up for your rights, unfortunately, no one else will come and fight for you.

Intra-company opportunities are generally not just about ambition. Communication networks, support from other teams, and adapting to the work culture are also effective. What we sometimes call "favoritism" can stem from these networks. However, if you feel justified, you can also anonymously report your concerns to HR.

I think it's just about buying, there's no other solution 🫢

Is no one reacting in the company? Has everyone gone silent? It's turned into a very interesting environment.

To call it favoritism would be unfair. You're talking about someone who managed to reach the principal, who was able to explain themselves, who faced them directly. It's worth considering what you did, too.

I think the "standing in front of" part is just fantasy. Did the manager just randomly choose this person? Being this close together isn't a normal work relationship. Just take a look at what's going on outside of the projects.