Before the wedding, my spouse had bought gold with their own money, saying specifically that it was their money. Now, during an argument, they said, 'I bought that gold too,' so I’m not sure if they want it back! Do you think this is normal or what should I do about this?
I think things that were not clearly discussed with your spouse are now coming to light. It's strange that they emphasize, 'I bought it with my own money' before the wedding. Normally, there shouldn’t be a you-and-me conflict in marriage, but apparently, there’s a distinction in their mind.
There's something strange here. I mean, they've seriously linked the discussion to those golds in some way. It's not just about saying 'I had it', we need to look at why they're bringing this up in the discussion. Maybe they're keeping something else bottled up inside 😬
I think you should speak openly, ask, 'Why did you say that, do you want it back?' There's no point in ruminating on this issue without getting a direct answer. However, if they actually say they want it back, then that means you have a serious financial sharing problem.
Let me update you, actually he didn't directly say "give back those golds," but since he suddenly said this during the discussion, I am starting to doubt it. He never used to bring up such topics before 😅
but this behavior is a serious indicator of control. You accepted those gold coins trusting that you are his partner, right? Marriage is an arrangement created by individuals together, not a game of economic power. It's really unpleasant for him to express it that way 😳
When financial matters in marriage are not clearly defined, such issues can arise. Particularly, bringing up past financial situations during arguments indicates a lack of communication between the couple. In such cases, consulting family counselors and learning ways to communicate openly and healthily can be beneficial.
