My roommate is literally cooking but leaving the dishes, not cleaning a shared space. It’s like they’re living in their own world. Honestly, I miss living with my family because I’ve become really stressed due to these situations. I’m scared to talk because I fear they’ll take it the wrong way, what do you suggest?
I experienced the same thing back then. My roommate would even leave the floors of the bathroom where he took his shower dirty. At first, I tried to be subtle about it, but then I realized it wasn’t working, so I told him directly, and that solved the problem. Even if they’re upset, you have to say something because otherwise, they won’t change.
Just sit down and speak clearly. It’s definitely not accusatory, but you need to use straightforward language. For example, you can say, ‘Look, when the common areas are not kept clean, I feel uncomfortable; let’s find a solution together about this.’
Maybe you’re also a bit too much of a perfectionist? You’ve said you’re cooking, but dishes aren’t something that can be washed immediately; maybe they’re just waiting their turn. Sharing a home requires a bit of flexibility as well.
So how do you think they would react if you implied something about the topic? For example, have you ever said things like ‘The dishes pile up when someone eats too much’ when there are too many dishes?
I also want to add that he sometimes cooks and stuff, so I can’t say he does nothing at all. But he never directly gets involved in cleaning, and as I said, I’m afraid to speak up.
Yeah, if I were in that position, I’d go straight into DM mode. I’d post something funny about it being cleaning week on WhatsApp, and then we’d figure it out accordingly. Honestly, very open conversations always make me feel a bit uneasy.