I haven’t been able to go out properly with my spouse for a year; doing something together has become impossible due to the budget. We even sometimes start cutting down on meals. They’ve also started to constantly monitor expenses. Occasionally, they say, ‘We have to,’ but I feel hurt unintentionally. How sustainable do you think romance is during such a time? Or do we just need to completely accept the economic realities?
You officially took me back six months… We also stopped going out because of the budget. For a while, we were calculating as soon as we woke up in the morning. I was really upset about those moments. Luckily, we talked openly and started doing nice things at home without spending any money. It’s not impossible, but both sides need to make an effort.
My daughter, people will naturally show solidarity in times like these. Even if you just make tea by candlelight and chat at home, that’s enough. These times are temporary, but treating each other poorly leaves lasting damage. Once you feel a little better, you can go outside; what’s important is understanding each other.
Look, I got stuck on this sentence of yours, you said “we have to, but I’m getting hurt unintentionally.” I think you’re being unfair here. If the guy hadn’t kept an eye on the expenses, wouldn’t an economic collapse wear you down even more? I think you need to consider it from his perspective a bit.
It’s very normal for conflicts to increase during such times. An economic crisis can directly affect communication and love between couples. Both sides can feel like “my burden is heavier.” If there are financial difficulties, it’s important to redefine expectations in a relationship. Focus on making time for each other within your means. If necessary, you can seek support from a therapist.
Thank you for the comments, I felt a bit more organized. I should also add that we actually used to go out a lot. Going to the movies, eating out, all of that had become a routine. Maybe that’s why I didn’t think of trying to do things at home.
I’m going to ask something, how long has this been going on like this? You said a year, but has your one-on-one activities completely stopped? For example, haven’t you had a chance to try even once a month?
So now your spouse is taking on economic responsibilities, but I wonder if they have become a bit too controlling? If they have gotten used to controlling expenses this much, could they go overboard in other matters in the future? I hope it’s just a temporary situation.