I'm 26 years old and I'm moving out of my family's home for the first time. I'm paying my rent with my own salary, taking care of everything myself, but my mom keeps saying, "You're just wasting money, stay here instead." To be honest, I want to live independently now. But their pressure is bothering me. Am I really making a mistake, or am I right? Is this just a phase, what do you think?
I experienced the same thing when I moved for the first time. My mom complained every time she called for a month, asking, 'Why are you moving out?' Then she saw that I had settled in, and she stopped. I think it's good to resist for a while; they get used to it 😅
The main issue here might not be "you're just wasting money," but rather the fear of separation. In traditional families, separation often happens "when you get married," after all. Have you tried having a conversation that makes them feel that you aren't breaking the emotional bond? 😅
But there is some truth in what your mother said. Is this really from necessity or just a decision to ‘live separately’? Because if you just want a feeling of freedom, it might be helpful to save a bit more money.
Actually, as I talk to you, I've realized that my mom's only issue isn't money. Sometimes she also says things like, 'you left us.' I'm really pondering how to convince her 🙂
It's no one's right to judge the money you've spent or the choices you've made. Ask if the effort you've given to your family has been sufficiently recognized over the years. The issue of your freedom even becoming a matter of war is something they need to resolve, not you.
If they are not people who can be easily convinced, show them a budget plan you will make before moving. For example, write down items like rent, bills, and savings one by one. Just saying 'I'll take care of it' might not seem concrete 🫣
