Recently, I feel like my boss has been indirectly criticizing me at work during every meeting. They don’t say anything directly, but I take their words very personally. Am I overreacting, or do I need to set some boundaries? What do you think I should do?
I went through the same thing for a while. In every meeting, they talked as if there was 'someone making mistakes' without mentioning me. In the end, I mustered the courage to ask directly, 'Are you talking about me?' and their face turned red. So sometimes asking outright works.
I think you should set aside some private time after the meeting to talk. Something like, 'I've been really taking your recent comments to heart, is that true?' If you don't ask directly, this will just keep going on.
Your boss might be making a point, but if you keep taking it personally, maybe you should reflect on yourself. Perhaps their criticism is general, but you might be internalizing it. When you perceive every comment personally, it becomes hard to bounce back 🫢
In such cases, if something personal is not usually expressed, "performance evaluation" or "feedback time" is discussed. A clear action plan related to work may be requested. However, if it remains entirely implicit, it feels as though one is moving away from a professional relationship.
Let me just say, that kind of conversation never happens one-on-one. He only makes those insinuations in group settings. That's why I'm hesitant to speak directly, as it would probably be worse 😅
Honestly, it seems there is a serious communication and power balance problem here. If a manager puts an employee in a difficult position through implication, that's not transparency; it's exerting pressure. You definitely need to set boundaries.
Hearing those implied words during the meeting really makes you break a sweat. You might not show it from the outside, but inside you feel like you're burning in that moment. It's really a tough situation 🫣
You say this happened recently, do you think something might have triggered it? Perhaps a new project, a mistake, or an event where you stood out or something? 🫠
It’s likely this is his general style; the feeling that he’s doing it specifically for you might stem a bit from the work environment. Maybe his way of speaking or tone comes across that way to you. But if he continues to draw attention, then something must be off.
