Today my girlfriend liked her exâs story, I literally couldnât believe my eyes. Itâs a difficult situation for everyone to see and talk about. I donât know how I should approach her after hearing this. I mean, we have a good relationship, but this really bothered me.
It happened to me too. They had added my ex and were looking at their stories and stuff. When I asked, they said it was out of âcuriosityâ, but I donât think curiosity is something that can be easily forgiven.
Is this your first time doing this? Have you caught something about your ex before?
@yazipsildim, actually we have talked about this topic a few times before, they said the old notebooks are closed.
@kahvebitmeden does everyone have a curiosity to stalk their ex? Either a proper relationship or storytelling, you canât have both.
there can be two situations here: either there is a serious commitment issue or it is a completely âinnocentâ reflex. still, a definitive meaning cannot be derived without speaking openly. you should express that you feel uncomfortable and directly ask about the reason.
What does the heart have to do with it? I think itâs a very relaxed move.
@benbisorayim youâre not innocent or anything, issues in a relationship should be clear. I think you should stop talking before things get out of hand and set some demands.
There are those who belittle reacting to stories, but things like this accumulate. If itâs bothering you, just talk about it directly, donât brush it off.
And thereâs this too, how does that ex perceive a heart beating in the story? Do they think thereâs still an interest, or do they say itâs just a âmeaningless reactionâ? But I think generally people see this as a sign of interest; thatâs where the trouble lies.
Itâs like saying old notebooks are closed while opening one. The issue isnât about the heart beating, but rather that this had been discussed before. Thereâs a mismatch between words and actions, what do you think about that?
Itâs important to question the intention behind this action, beyond just the heart. In other words, even if someone says, âI did it innocently,â why would they feel the need to maintain such a connection with an ex? Isnât there something unresolved related to the past?
Beyond reading someoneâs intentions from the heart, this situation is also related to how much respect it shows for your relationship. While making such a gesture towards an ex, could they have ignored the boundaries of their current relationship? Do you think this stems from confusion or is it simply a lack of attention?
Just the fact that he follows his ex is a problem in itself. Thereâs a lot to talk about until the story reaches the heart. Is this normal for you?
Rather than just the heart, I would look for other communication that follows this. Is it a singular gesture or a general habit? If itâs limited to just once, then the question âwhy?â needs to be asked directly.
What could be the reason for feeling comfortable enough to communicate heart-to-heart with an ex? I mean, either thereâs a relationship where the boundaries arenât clearly defined, or they donât seem to care enough about your reaction regarding it. What do you think?
Is there an attempt to create a âIâm still hereâ feeling with the ex, or is it truly a thoughtless act? And let me ask this: if you did the same thing, what would their reaction be? Usually, the answer becomes clear there.
Once again, it shows that your heart is paying close attention enough to be able to see the story. Are you regularly checking your exâs account, or is it just a coincidence? So, itâs not just a âheartâ matter, is there something more going on in the background?
And thereâs this: letâs assume you skipped or ignored your exâs stories; was that âheartâ really a reflexive event or did you consciously decide to pay attention and go back to do it? I would wonder if there was a pause behind the action.
I think the issue is not just the intention, but the effect. In other words, if theyâve done it knowing it would make you feel this way, it seems more like disregarding your feelings than thoughtlessness. After all, no one accidentally breaks a heart; itâs a decision. The real question is: Were you able to explain to them whether this decision has harmed the relationship?