I had planned to go out with my girlfriend, but my mom didn't allow it. She said things like, 'What do you need to do with girls, stay home.' Now I have to convince her, but at the same time, I understand my mom's worries. What should I do? How can I resolve this tension between my family and me so I can meet up comfortably?
Are you still asking for permission from your mom at this age?
How old are you? Do you live in the same house with your mother?
@kahvebitmeden I'm 23 years old, and yes, we're living in the same house because of the rent 😐
@aklimkaldi then learn to stop talking back to your family a bit. Is it always like this?
I also canceled a lot of my plans because of my mom in the past. At one point, I sat down calmly and talked it over, and I started to set boundaries. It took time, but it worked.
You really need to understand what your mother’s concern is. Is it a trust issue, or something else? Ask clearly: 'Can you explain exactly why you don’t want to?' Maybe you can clarify a fundamental misunderstanding.
@biseydiycem everyone’s living conditions are different, you know? If you live in the same house as your mom, the permission talk inevitably comes up. Not everyone is in a position to live independently 😐
Does your mom often stop you when you go out, or is this a specific situation? If this is generally the case, it might be worth evaluating how reasonable your mom's concerns are. She may not be able to talk openly with you but could be struggling to manage her worries 🥲
Maybe your mother can't adapt to your adulthood and still acts with a protective instinct like you're a little kid. But that's not an excuse to restrict your social life. You need to take a clear stand on issues like curfew; otherwise, this will continue.
So, what exactly did he say this time to avoid meeting you? What was his excuse? Start from there, and you’ll really see if there’s any logic to it.
