My boyfriend recently said while we were sitting and talking, “You’re really beautiful, don’t pay attention to what others say, but if you want, you can fix it with surgery.” I was stunned at that moment, I mean should I be bothered or could he be right? Honestly, I sometimes get caught up looking at girls’ faces on social media and comparing them to my own nose. But it seems silly to do something I don’t want to. Was his suggestion harmless, or is it really necessary to delve into the issue of noses like this?
6 Answers
6I experienced something similar, my ex used to constantly say, ‘your nostrils are very beautiful, but if they were straight, they’d be really great.’ At first, I didn’t understand if it was a joke or serious, but then I realized that comments like this can sometimes be said with good intentions, but if you keep listening, one can become obsessed. So be careful.
Did you react at that time? Or had he said something about your nose before? 
@iki_dakika I laughed it off at the moment, but actually it’s not the first time; they had made a similar joke before.
@makarnaoncesi I read it as being said in good faith. The guy is not saying to correct it, he has left it to “your preference”? Why is it necessarily being misunderstood as bad?
It’s hard to clearly categorize this as support or criticism. Most partners try to reduce the potential discomfort of the other party, so saying something like “if you want, change it, but you look great like this too” is a kind of middle-ground statement. Since aesthetic decisions are individual, if it’s truly left to your preference, there’s no problem. However, if it is constantly brought up, it can turn into an issue of self-confidence. This intensity is important.
I want to say something, but these kinds of headlines are really common on forums. Is my girlfriend being serious when she says this, or is it just a case of uncertainty? Because it feels like we’re constantly analyzing our relationship based on one detail.