I’ve been exercising regularly for 3 months, and I’ve made quite a bit of progress, but my coach has started asking me more about my personal life… I think I shouldn’t have to talk about my work or family, but on the other hand, maybe I’m just fooling myself into thinking they are just being caring. Is this normal, or should I set some boundaries? Do we women in the gym always live like this?
7 Answers
7I had a similar situation. At first, we only talked about sports, but later the coach started to get really involved in my personal life. At first, I thought, ‘It’s normal, after all, we’re getting to know each other.’ Then I realized he was crossing a line a bit. I explicitly told him that I didn’t want to get into these topics, and he quickly pulled himself together. I think you should try to politely set your boundaries.
Exactly, when someone starts asking about your job and even your family, you feel a bit strange. Even if there’s no invasion of privacy, you find yourself thinking, ‘what’s the need for all this detail?’ Especially when you’re trying to focus on exercising and things like that keep popping up.
The issue here isn’t whether you’re skeptical or not, but whether he observes professional boundaries. Regardless of the industry he’s in, a man showing excessive interest in a woman’s private life while doing his job violates work ethics. Saying ‘Maybe he’s well-intentioned’ is actually a typical burden placed on women. If you don’t feel comfortable, put your foot down!
I mean, you’re constantly face-to-face with someone at the gym, isn’t it natural to have a chat? I think you might be exaggerating, people’s curiosity about each other doesn’t always have to be seen as flirting or boundary violation. I think you should observe a bit first, don’t be unfair to the guy right away 
Thank you for the comments, honestly what you said made me think. For example, today they asked something about my personal life again, but I brushed it off; despite that, instead of changing the subject, it felt like they pressed a bit more. I really felt uneasy. I guess I need to say something clear now.
In such situations, the concept of ‘personal space’ is important. You have the right to indicate that you do not want to talk about your private life. If the discomfort increases, you can share the situation with the gym management. Remember, a professional’s role is to focus on your health and fitness program.
You can directly stop him by saying, “Sir, I prefer not to talk about my personal life.” If necessary, explain the situation to another authority figure in the room. It’s always better to resolve such things before they escalate 