They're trying to break off the engagement because they think the salary is 'too low'

Ah, that feeling is so familiar... My dad also confronted me during my old engagement, saying "Did we raise a girl who earns this much?" They would pressure me morning and night, and you really feel caught in between. My advice to you is to sit down with your boyfriend and decide together how long you'll resist. Because if it's just your conflict, it will tire you out so much.

Let's be clear, the issue here isn't actually about the salary or anything like that; it's about the families' desire for control. They put pressure on someone who doesn't fit their standards because they think their decisions are superior. You don't have to live your life as a favor to anyone. This is your choice — if you own it, you'll always feel stronger.

So how do you discuss this standard with your family? I mean, when they say 'this salary won't do', what do you say? Do you debate with them over a specific number or limit, or is it more of a general 'we don't want this' situation? Because if there's something definitive, you might need to talk about whether your friend will take action at that point.

Let me add this: my family, especially my mom, is always giving examples like, 'how will you educate your children in the future, how will you manage the household?' My boyfriend, on the other hand, says, 'we both will work, and we will manage comfortably.' It’s as if my family has this mindset that only one person will be working. But because of their priorities, there’s basically no peace left.

I think you can try to alleviate your mother's concerns like 'child, home' with a financial plan. Let's sit down and create a small budget, for example: your salaries, living expenses, potential savings... Then share this table with your family. Sometimes people can react less emotionally when they see something on paper.