Recently, my boyfriend has started implying that having a nose job wouldnât be a bad idea. He brings up aesthetics in every conversation, but he doesnât say anything outright. Iâve been happy with my appearance until now; I donât know if heâs planted this idea in my head. Do you think this is jealousy or something more essential? What should I do?
6 Answers
6I went through the same thing, I swear. My ex-boyfriend subtly pressured me to get my eyebrows done. He would constantly say things like, âthick eyebrows are really in right nowâ and show me examples. After a while, I became obsessed, but when I finally did it, I realized that I didnât want it for myself at all. Now heâs gone, and Iâve gone back to my old eyebrows. I think you should ask yourself from the beginning, is this really what you want?
Iâm saying this from a male perspective; sometimes we speak in plain logic. If he suggests that, it might be because he wants you to be more confident in front of others. But if he canât express it openly, I donât think itâs a strong imposition. I mean, youâre completely free; donât think of it as jealousy or obsession. Most guys directly associate aesthetics with confidence.
Actually, this is a very common situation, especially in relationships where people may want to shape each other over time. Perhaps this aesthetic talk is completely influenced by modern society; everyone is making comparisons because of that. But the critical point here is questioning something youâve been satisfied with until now. It feels like an external influence.
Honestly, itâs something really confusing. Youâre content with your own state, but when someone constantly insinuates something indirectly, you canât help but question yourself, âAm I thinking wrong?â I think you should first weigh it within yourself: do these comments actually indicate a need for you? Or are you just being influenced by their continuous mention? This feeling almost feels like a slight pressure, so to speak.
I think youâre a bit troubled. If youâve been fine from the start, why are you stressing so much now? I mean, in the end, no one has pushed you, nobody said, âyou must do this.â Maybe youâre being a bit too sensitive. Someone who has confidence in themselves wouldnât be affected this much, right? Think about that too.
You have your points, but I need to add that the way he implies it is more like a tone of âyouâd be even more perfect with a beautiful nose.â In other words, he doesnât directly say âI donât like you,â but that feeling comes across indirectly. Plus, he praises othersâ aesthetics a lot around me. Even if I wanted to get something done for myself, I would now doubt it just because he said that.