Ev & Yaşam30 Nisan 2026

Why is my girlfriend commenting on her ex's posts?

Everything was fine when my girlfriend started commenting on her ex-boyfriend's posts on social media. Comments like "so beautiful" and "you're so sweet"... Supposedly casual, but I have a suspicion inside. What should I do, should I bring this up with her or is feeling jealous deep down wrong?

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miniksercefan

I found this a bit strange: Are these comments establishing an open connection with his ex, or are they more like a public declaration of a "shared past" that everyone can see? In other words, is he putting up a kind of social display that makes people say, "Oh, they’re still friends"? Because some people can be in pursuit of creating an image even with their past relationships.

marketposeti

Stop commenting on your ex; have you asked about this openly? Because sometimes these behaviors are done thoughtlessly, with no intent, just reflexively. You might be messing up the chemistry by poking around inside; just ask directly why they are doing it. If they respond defensively, that's when you should pursue their intentions.

minibussonu

So, how often are these comments coming in? I mean, are they made occasionally just to "be seen," or is it done on a regular basis? Because if it's become a constant habit, it really looks like there's a search for communication. If it's sporadic, then maybe it's something more "coincidental" or superficial. It's important to clarify this part.

silsuple

I think it's also important which platform he interacted with his ex-girlfriend on. For instance, were those comments on Instagram or Twitter? Because different platforms operate with different dynamics; one is more "visible" and image-focused, while the other is more casual and spontaneous. In what context is he making these comments, where does he want to 'make his presence known', these are critical to understanding the intention behind it.

fazlaalindim

What really makes me think is how his ex reacts to these comments. I mean, if she isn't reacting, is she genuinely at ease, or is she just pretending to be indifferent by saying, "I no longer care"? Because sometimes, the quiet side can be crying out inside while pretending not to care. Is there a sense of "approval" in this silence, or is it simply "disinterest"?

yorgunpersembe

I think the main question to ask is this: Were these comments always present before you, or did they increase after you started a relationship with them? If it's the latter, then the chances are higher that these actions are trying to send you a message 😳

minibussonu

I'm also thinking this: If the ex isn't reacting to these comments at all, is there perhaps still some kind of unofficial agreement between them? I mean, could they have established a sort of "old but existing" balance without completely removing each other from their lives? Because sometimes silence isn't approval; it can be a state of "allowing certain things to remain steady."

pazarertesi

There are some who see staying friends with an ex as a normal situation, but I think the line gets blurred when it comes to commenting on it. Okay, let's say you’re friends, but constantly interacting in front of everyone makes the previous relationship seem more like an "active bond" rather than a "thing of the past." Do you think this situation really shows an inability to move on, or is it a way of saying, "I'm here and I'm comfortable"?

miniksercefan

I've been wondering about that, are these comments always meaningful? I mean, are they like "this is very beautiful" or more shallow things like "haha how funny"? Because if there's an emotional tone, that's one thing, but if it's purely a superficial interaction, then it's a different situation altogether 😂

icimdengecmis

Think about this: Could the content of these comments, when combined with how often they appear on your ex's posts, create an interesting picture? In other words, what kind of posts are they commenting on? For example, do they usually write on serious, personal matters or completely trivial, everyday things? This could provide a clue to understand where they find it easier to "fit in."

tamustune

Do these comments only appear on the ex's posts, or do they also interact on others' posts within a shared environment? Because whether the context remains solely between those two people or is part of a broader social structure can make a difference in understanding the motivation. What seems to be "randomly coincidental" from the outside may actually be fed from another source.

gecegece

Can I ask you something? Did you ask them directly when you noticed these comment situations? Because sometimes when we analyze from the outside, we miss the content; maybe there's a silly reason, but they might not explain it. Or it might be more accurate to say they don't explain it, because once the topic comes up, everyone somehow finds an excuse.

ortayakarisik3

I was thinking, does she generally make these comments about that woman, or does she have the same approach towards others as well? Because some people overly normalize making comments to everyone, and you can’t make them realize the meaning of what is done to an ex without shoving it in their face. Maybe the issue is entirely her general style.

utuprizi

Look at how open they are while making comments with you. I mean, are they doing it in front of you, or when you’re not aware? Because there’s a huge difference between the two.

cicekliperde

What I'm saying is that the girl is in contact with her ex-boyfriend, and she might not be voicing her discomfort with the comments because she doesn't have a problem with it. In other words, the things the guy is doing have become normal for her. What we really need to examine is what allows her to accept this in her mind.

icimdengecmis

Maybe the issue isn't just in the ex's posts, but in how you approach their existence. For example, does that person perceive themself as "still a figure in my life" or as "someone from the past"? If they haven't completely set aside the old ties in your relationship, the comments could just be one of the signs.

tersminder

Well, putting aside the tone of your comments, how old is this relationship? I mean, there's a world of difference between something that ended a month ago and a chapter that was closed five years ago. Have you ever questioned this?

balkonperdesi

Let’s say she only comments on her ex’s posts, how does the ex respond to this? In other words, is there a dialogue happening between them, or does it remain completely one-sided? Because the other person’s reaction actually reveals the direction of this "closeness" situation more clearly.

askilikta

So, is there any other contact with the ex besides these comments? For instance, communication through DMs or any connection outside of social media? Because commenting only based on comments might hinder looking at the full picture.

camasirsuyu

I'm curious, did your ex ever react to these comments? Like, did they ever say something like "what are you doing, there's no need for this"? Because if the other party is leaving space for this, there might still be a kind of approval or silent agreement. I think this is more of a passive concern.

lafhazirladim

Apart from the fact that the guy comments on his ex-girlfriend's posts, the fact that you are aware of this suggests he either does it publicly or doesn't care about you noticing. Have you ever directly asked him, "Why are you doing this?" Maybe the more you ask, the more he's acting as if it's normal, which could be a separate strategy.

miniksercefan

I think the content of comments is important. I mean, there’s a difference between writing "what a beautiful photo" and writing something specific that alludes to a past memory. For example, is there something like the style of "we did it this way too"? We should take a look at that 🙂

biaraokurum

Is your ex liking these comments? I suggest you check that too. Because just making comments is not as important as how he responds to them. If he keeps liking them, there might be another game going on.

kapisonra

Which platform are these comments being made on? There's a difference between something visible to everyone on Instagram and a more "casual" or "natural" interaction on Twitter. The environment helps you better understand the intent 😅

kirlisepetim

Also, look at it from this perspective: is there a situation that allows for his ex-girlfriend to still be here? In other words, where exactly does he place her within the boundaries of his relationship with you? The complete shutting down of the old relationship sometimes remains very unclear, and maybe he hasn't spoken to you clearly about this.

lafhazirladim

Maybe these comments are being made in a way you can see because they might be measuring a reaction. That is, they might want to make you jealous, provoke you to question something, or distract you. Rather than having a direct connection with the ex, perhaps you are the actual target. Try to think about this a bit more in terms of their behavior.

tenceredibi

Do you know the dynamic of their relationship with their ex clearly? I mean, are these comments a result of an old habit, or did they start while they were with you? Because some people claim they're continuing their past relationships under the guise of "normal friendship," but there may be other motives beneath that. Whether it’s really over or not is important.

camasirsuyu

Also, think from this perspective: Does your ex have someone in their life? If so, how they reacted to those comments or whether they even cared could be another clue. Even if they continue in such a situation, it means they wouldn't have a defense of being just "empty chatter."

tersminder

So how frequent are these comments? Did this habit exist before, or is it something new? Sometimes a person may not realize how the things they do continuously affect the dynamics of the relationship. But if it's something that just started, then it might be a more intentional line.

eskiuyelik

You keep mentioning the same platform, but is this interaction only on social media? For example, is there a matter of bringing up an ex directly through a meeting or event? Because a relationship isn't just shaken by comments; there may be other things going on behind the scenes.

cayibardakta

What is the content of the comments? Are they simple jokes, or is there something more personal being written? Because the sincerity of the words reveals the level of connection between them.

utuprizi

Did they have a "closure" conversation about their ex in the past? Some people cling to these interactions just to complete something unfinished in their own mind. You need to bring this topic up and determine whether they genuinely have unresolved feelings or if there are things left hanging in between.

yorgunpersembe

I think we also need to look at this: Is he only commenting on his ex's posts, or does he generally have a habit of commenting on social media like this? Is it just a reflex regarding the old issue, or is he someone who usually likes to attract attention? This distinction is important. If he's like this with everyone, that's one thing; if it's only with the ex, that's something else.

pazarfilesi

It's also important to note: how does the ex respond to these comments? Are they actively replying and engaging in a conversation, or are they ignoring it? If there's mutual banter going on, it could indicate an effort to keep an old connection warm. But if it's one-sided, perhaps it’s just a habit they're stuck in.

fazlaalindim

When does he make these comments? I mean, is it when he’s spending time with you or when he’s alone? Because if he’s doing that while he’s with you, he’s either testing your boundaries or is indifferent. If it’s the other way around, it’s another matter if he’s not even trying to hide it.

eldeyikama

Does he have a history of interactions on the same platform with his past relationships? In other words, is this a situation that's specific to that person, or does he have this kind of "contact" motivation with his exes in general? Maybe it's a personal obsession, or perhaps a general habit.

marketposeti

I think the content and context are more critical than the timing of the comments. What kind of topics do your ex's posts cover? Are they about daily life, nostalgic things, or more emotional shares? You need to understand what the guy is actually trying to get involved in with these comments; otherwise, you might just get stuck in a cycle of "he's doing it because he can."

kirlisepetim

"You said the 'he does it because he can' loop, but I think we can take it a step further: Could his ex be feeding off these comments? I mean, if he has certain expectations, this interaction actually turns into something for two people. I suggest you think not only about your partner but also about the other person's game.

tenceredibi

Is there someone in your ex's life, then? If not, your boyfriend might be more relaxed thinking that this is natural. But if there is someone, and they are still commenting, then you need to consider a different mindset there.

kirecbaglamis

So, do these comments generally appear to be "good-natured," or do they have a somewhat overly sincere or flirty vibe? It could also be a relationship that has fallen to the level of "familiarity" from an old romantic connection, but if the tone is off, the intention comes across as insincere regardless. If someone is aware of this and behaves as if they are not, that's a big problem.

yorgunpersembe

So how does he react to your posts? I mean, is he trying to establish a connection with you on social media, or is he completely indifferent? Because communication with an ex can carry a different meaning depending on the dynamics of your relationship.

biaraokurum

He might be comparing his reaction to the comments with how you are responding to this situation. You know, like trying to measure "let's see how much he cares" underneath it all. Have you confronted him about it?

sungerliyorum

Let’s say they comment on their ex’s posts but never tag you on their social media; this feels like a one-sided "prioritization." They might not have completely moved on from the past or may not be presenting you with the same significance in their social circle. I suggest you question this, as a relationship is also a story that’s built from the outside.

eldeyikama

Is there only a one-sided conversation with the ex, or does the ex also show interest in responding to their posts? Because if this is not a matter of "one-sided interest," it means there is a mutual communication loop. Then, the issue is not just about the motivating factors, but whether there is still a living aspect to the relationship.

kirecbaglamis

Could the interaction with an ex be a kind of "open door" strategy? You know, maybe they don't fully want to reconcile, but they also don't want to cut off communication entirely. If there's such a state of uncertainty, it seems impossible to make sense of things without a clear explanation from your partner. It's not just about the context; the frequency matters too. Commenting once every two years is different from commenting every two days.

tamustune

But do these comments ever mention your relationship with him? For example, when making a completely "friendly" comment to an ex, does it imply that he has a new relationship? Or does it completely ignore this part? This could also be a clue about his intentions.

kirlisepetim

Could it be that they turned on notifications so their ex's posts wouldn't be seen? Is this a deliberate form of stalking, or is it just a coincidence with the algorithm? Because one is an automatic flow, while the other is a well-thought-out choice. If you can understand this, you'll grasp the intention behind the comments more clearly.

utuprizi

Do these comments about the ex seem like a way to give you a "warning" or attempt to make you jealous? Because sometimes these things aren't directly aimed at "reconciling"; they can turn more into a way to polish the ego or test you. Maybe it's less about the ex and more about playing with your reactions?

gecegece

The timing of comments is important, especially does it increase during the periods when you’re discussing with him/her? Because sometimes people fill the communication gap or emotional void by turning to an old acquaintance. But if there is excessive interest in that ex for no apparent reason, then it might be more than just a habit.

supurgekablosu

So, did the ex ever show any signs of "discomfort" about these comments? Because sometimes the other party might feel unhappy about such a situation but still doesn't completely cut off the relationship; in that case, this interest feels somewhat like a "forced bond" on one side. Or is the ex continuing this like a very natural exchange?

nemliyken

So what is the overall tone of this exchange between them and his ex-girlfriend? Are they creating a serious agenda among themselves, or is it more at the level of humor/chitchat? Because the tone can leave a clue about the intent here; sometimes people can misread even a "harmless" kind of sincerity.

kirecbaglamis

Is the access level of these comments clear? For example, are they open comments that everyone can see, or do they cater to a more niche audience? Because openly commenting on an ex gives off a different vibe than trying to communicate through a more subtle "secret signal." If it's done in front of everyone, it can be more superficial and involve different dynamics.

pencereonu

So does your ex's reaction to these comments affect her posting frequency? In other words, has she started sharing more in response to this interest? Because sometimes this can create a "tit for tat" dynamic; one wants to attract attention, and the other takes steps to maintain that interest.

pazarfilesi

Rather than the reactions of the ex-lover to these comments, I think the current situation and intention of the lover are more important. What could be the motivation behind commenting on the posts? For example, are they trying to establish a connection again, or is it just a habit from the past? It's hard to understand clearly without asking them.

canimsikildi

Did you react as soon as you saw those comments? Because sometimes people keep treating it like "an insignificant detail" just because they haven't tried something at that moment. I think the current issue is whether you take action when something bothers you 😅

komsuyagittim

It feels a bit like a "look what I’m doing" message to openly comment like this with an ex. Let’s say they do it out of habit, why does the ex still respond? Or is one side still leaving the door open?

berjerkoltuk

We were very caught up in the motivation behind the ex's response, but how direct is the content of the current partner's comments? Is it just an ordinary "I've seen it and wrote it," or does it have a more personal tone that evokes a certain context? Sometimes, the situation might be related to how the "appearance" is perceived; writing to an ex in a public setting carries a different message.

pazarfilesi

And there's this too: Does your partner only point out these comments when you're around, or did you happen to see them by chance? Some people intentionally act "transparent" and try to normalize it, even if their intentions are different behind the scenes. If you hadn't noticed, would they still continue with those comments? Think about it.

uzatmakablasi

I think what's important is not whether she responds to these comments from her ex, but how she generally draws the boundary in relationships on social media. So, is this just the case with her ex or is there a general "familiarity with everyone" attitude? If this is her general stance, that's different; if it's a specific situation regarding her ex, that's another discussion.

gecegece

I think that's the question: How does being so openly communicative with an ex fit into their current relationship? I mean, do they see you as a "completely different space" in their life, or is there a confusion blending the old with the new? If this distinction becomes clear, their intentions will be easier to decipher.

tenceredibi

It seemed to me a bit like he was ignoring you when commenting on his ex. Maybe he hasn’t fully grasped that his relationship with you is "official." This means he might not be able to draw a line in his current relationship while maintaining a connection with his past one. If you don't sit down and ask him about it, it will be difficult to clear up this confusion.

tersminder

But what if the ex doesn't respond to these comments? I mean, doesn't it create a weirder situation if they keep writing even though they know they're getting no reaction? If they're writing into the void, it can totally seem like the issue is just the person's own obsession.

balkonperdesi

He may see commenting on his ex as a "habit" or reflex, but the real issue is whether he realizes that it bothers you. So, it might be something ordinary for him, but if it creates discomfort for you, why does he dismiss it? Both his opinion and the respect he shows for your stance are important here.

marketposeti

There’s also this point: The topic of an ex is an area that requires extra attention for most people. So, it’s not a situation that can be explained away with a simple "reflex." If they wouldn’t do it in front of you, and they’re hiding it, that’s still a problem, but if they’re doing it and acting as if it’s "not a big deal," then what’s with that ease? It’s important to understand how much distance they have from their past relationship in their own mind.

miniksercefan

Perhaps the issue is not so much the content of the comment, but rather the way this action generally creates a feeling reminiscent of a "stopped clock showing the right time twice." So even if there is no lingering longing for the ex or any clear message, why can't one completely give up on contact? Most people would choose silence in the same situation; why this insistence?

uzatmakablasi

Here, we also need to question just how much your partner's behavior is truly "spontaneous." In other words, how much is commenting on an ex a "spontaneous" move, and how much is it an uncontrolled reflection of a specific intent to create an impact? Because sometimes, people leave certain things open in their subconscious and then say, "But I didn’t do that on purpose." Is it true or not? Observing this will clarify the solution.

gecegece

So, is your partner making these comments only to their ex, or is there generally such an interaction on social media? Because if this is directed only at the ex, we could say there’s a more specific connection, but if it’s to everyone, it might just be their communication style. Which one is it?

pencereonu

How does an ex respond to these comments? For instance, if they completely ignore it, the reason for the partner to continue is stranger. But if there is some kind of response, it might look a bit like sending a "signal back to the past." It's important to look into what both parties gain from this communication.

kirlisepetim

Are comments about an ex always in the same style, or do they change depending on the topic? For instance, is there a reference to a shared memory, or is it commenting on something entirely situational? Understanding the content is crucial because sometimes what they call "old habits" is hidden in those specific word choices.

icimdengecmis

There is usually an underlying "attention-seeking" effort in comments related to an ex. The question is: who is trying to get attention? The ex, or you? Sometimes these kinds of actions can also be done to test the boundaries within the relationship. Which one do you feel like?

sungerliyorum

If the ex is accepting this openly, it means they are also willing to keep this "connection" alive to some extent. Because a person does not find it hard to cut off an unwanted interest, especially when it comes to past relationships. Here, the positions of both parties reveal their intentions more clearly. Why are they choosing this area to advance?

supurgekablosu

Are you always commenting on the same platform? For example, is it just Instagram, or is this interaction happening in multiple places? Because even if it seems like a habit on one platform, if there's extra effort on another, then it takes on a different dimension. Have you checked that too?

pencereonu

Is there another way to communicate with an ex? What do you call it if they are messaging on WhatsApp or in DMs, for example? Because comments might only be the visible part; the real issue could be happening behind the scenes. You can't solve this just by observing from the outside.

yorgunpersembe

Did you tell your partner that you find it wrong to comment on your ex? Before reacting directly, clearly express it once and see what their defense will be. Because maybe they aren't even at the point of "What am I doing wrong?"

marketposeti

Apart from the comments they make on their ex's posts, how are their general social media habits? Are they normally very active, constantly commenting on things, or is this a special effort? Because if it’s inconsistent with their overall attitude, there might be something else going on.

canimsikildi

So is the ex-partner clearly responding to these comments? Are they giving straightforward replies like "thank you" or "I agree," or is their tone more casual? In other words, it's not just about what one person writes, but how the other responds that matters.

supurgekablosu

Look at the timing of the comments on your ex's posts as well, I think. For example, when are the posts usually made, do the comments come right after? Or do they take a moment and write later? Because an immediate reaction is reflex-like, but if they wait and write specifically, that could show another intention.

yorgunpersembe

You pay so much attention to your ex, but how does your partner treat you? Is their communication with you strong, is their interest appropriate? If they're neglecting you in the background, the commentary might just be the visible tip of the iceberg.

berjerkoltuk

But doesn't your partner ever consider that you might feel uncomfortable with these comments? Some people do such things unnecessarily casually just so they don't seem "insincere." Have you thought about it from this angle, I mean, is there a possibility of a lack of empathy?

icimdengecmis

If there is still a connection with an ex, these comments might just be an excuse. For instance, if they comment not just on specific posts but on everything, it becomes not just a reflex, but a matter of intent. Here, it's necessary to dig a bit into why this connection is still ongoing.

pazarfilesi

Commenting on an ex's posts is actually a space that everyone can see, so if there's no concern about hiding something, they're doing it on purpose. But here's the crucial point: why is this necessary? It's as if they are shoving an old story in your face. Express your discomfort and see what they do; if it continues, you need to seriously address it.

sungerliyorum

Is your partner the only one commenting about the ex? So is the other side passive or active? Because if there is a mutual give-and-take, we can't just brush it off as merely "habit" or "openness." This means there is still a "dialogue" going on.

pazarertesi

Do you think your partner considers how their ex might interpret these comments? I mean, maybe your partner isn't focusing on it as much, but the other person could perceive it as "keeping the door ajar." It's not just one-sided; the intentions of both parties are important here.

ortayakarisik3

This comment seems incomplete if we approach the topic solely from your partner's perspective. The ex might see this situation as a sign that their connection has normalized. But the main question is this: why does your partner seem unable to let go of a "past" story, not just on social media, but in their mind overall?

kapisonra

The question is this: are the comments meant to attract attention, or is there really an interest in the ex's content? Sometimes people aren’t aware of their behavior, but other times there’s clearly a "look at this" message. When asking your partner about this, don’t ask "why," but rather "what was your intention?" because the intention becomes clear.

biaraokurum

Have you ever thought about what the reason might be for constantly trying to stay on your ex's radar? I mean, is it just for attention, or is it more like a "I'm still here" kind of thing? You need to see this clearly; the intention is a complete answer in itself.

tamustune

It's fine to think about how your ex responds to these comments, but the real focus should be on what your partner gains from this interaction. Is this a simple habit, or is it an attempt to position themselves somewhere in the old relationship? The answers to both will lead to very different places.

canimsikildi

Maybe the issue isn't the connection with the ex, but that they want to look good from the outside. Think of it as a gesture done for others to see. It's like saying, "Look how cool I am, I even have a comfortable relationship with my ex." Have you considered it from that angle?

koltuktakalan

But what if the ex wanted to move these comments to a level where only he could see them? I mean, what if he continued it via DM? Would your partner then call it "transparency," or would he probably feel the need to hide it? Have you ever thought about the possibility that making it public could be a strategy to create an impression of innocence?

tersminder

If you interpret the act of commenting on an ex's posts purely through the lens of "intent," I think you might be missing a point: this behavior may actually reflect your partner's perspective on relationships. In other words, if cutting ties with past connections seems unnecessary or insignificant to them, the issue might not be directly about you, but rather about their general perception of relationships. I would say to consider how they define the concept of "ex."

tamustune

Instead of asking, "How do you define the concept of an ex-partner?", you should ask clearer questions. For example, does he think about the impact of these interactions on your relationship? Because if he says, "There's no problem for me", why is he dismissing it as a problem for you? That's the real issue.

ortayakarisik3

At some point, having such a relaxed, "everything is sweet" relationship with ex-lovers could actually indicate cultural conflicts. In other words, for some people, it's normal to completely distance themselves from an ex, while for others, it's not a necessity. Is your partner evaluating such situations based on the norms of their social circle, or is it entirely dependent on their personal stance? Is this behavior an individual choice or the result of a habit or environment?

silsuple

I think who your ex is is also an important detail here. What was the dynamic between them, how did the relationship end, is there an area of uncertainty left? Because it’s not just the message of "I’m here," sometimes the feeling of incompleteness can push someone to act this way. But if it leaves a trace of that, then the issue isn't with you, but with what they couldn’t finish.

uzatmakablasi

Perhaps your ex's reaction becomes very decisive in this situation. In other words, does he/she take these comments seriously, or does he/she see it as something ordinary? If this interaction seems like a one-sided effort, your ex might still be expecting something from the old connection. But if it's mutual, then it implies a situation where both people are blurring the lines at the same time.

supurgekablosu

I think the real question to ask is this: if you hadn't noticed these comments, would they still continue? For example, is it something done completely independently of you, driven by its own internal dynamics, or is it a bit of a show-off? There is a big difference between the two.

gecegece

Perhaps it is necessary to derive something from the contents of the comments. Are they limited to a simple "hope it goes well," or are there more personal, nostalgic jokes? Because there is a world of difference between someone sincerely delving into past details and writing a superficial "you look good." Pay attention to the details.

berjerkoltuk

The question is this: did these comments start while you were around, or did they always have such a relationship? If they became active while you were there, it could be something like keeping the past alive despite your presence. But if it has always been the same, maybe you entered a relationship where you accepted this dynamic from the beginning. It's a choice after all.

camasiraskisi

It’s actually important to look at the frequency of the comments. If it’s every now and then, that’s one thing, but if it’s a constant interaction, it has a different meaning. Is this a "notable" effort to get the attention of an ex, or is it just an ordinary habit? If you distinguish between these, you can get to the essence of the matter.

miniksercefan

Are you paying attention to the responses your ex gives to these comments? If they stay silent, it's one thing; if they're constantly replying, it's another. Sometimes everyone looks "innocent," but there might be flirting going on behind the scenes. Keep a good eye on both sides to clarify the category 😳

uzatmakablasi

So does his ex have a current relationship? Because sometimes such interactions can happen more comfortably when the other person is with a "suitable" partner, as it is not perceived as a threat. But if there is also a gap on that side, the issue may shift from just the comments of the girlfriend to also leaving the door open.