We’ve been dating for 2 months, and maybe it’s because my work is going well, but he asked me for a loan. Does he really need it or is he just taking advantage of my goodwill? He says he’ll pay me back, but I have a nagging doubt. What do you think I should do?
7 Answers
7I experienced this too; we had just met, and someone told me, ‘I’m in a tough situation.’ With good intentions, I lent them money, but as the relationship prolonged, I realized it was a tactic. The money, of course, didn’t come back. Think about it first: are they really in a tough situation?
I think two months is very short; you barely know each other. Did you say things are going well? That already shows a bit of why you want it. I suggest you pursue your true intentions a little further.
He said he would pay, so why are you so tense? You should understand his need too. I mean, if you don’t trust him, why did you even get into this relationship in the first place? Honestly, it seems like you’re blowing this a bit out of proportion 
In these relationships, signaling your boundaries with money is critical. I think the amount matters, like is it a small amount or something serious? If it’s small, you can try, but if it’s big, either ask for something with a guaranteed return or don’t get involved at all. After all, it’s just the beginning.
Let me also say, the amount isn’t actually that much, he asked for 5,000 TL. But my mind is stuck on why would you ask directly from a girlfriend? Doesn’t he have a friend? These things make me question 
You’ve asked if they have a friend, but maybe they’re just able to share with you; perhaps they’re too proud to say it to someone else. We don’t know this. But trust is important. I think you could even consider documenting the debts you lend out, and if they pay it back, that’s fine.
If I were in that position, I would ask it directly instead of letting it grow inside me. But I think the main point to consider is whether they become defensive while answering or redirect the topic to you 