My partner has recently started asking me for small loans constantly. At first, I didn’t mind it, but it has become more frequent and the repayments are also delayed. I can’t help but wonder if I’m being used. Do you think this is a situation that can sustain a relationship?
5 Answers
5I’ve experienced the same thing, it felt strange at first but you don’t care at the beginning. My ex used to ask for small amounts of money, and then it added up quite a bit. He even said, ‘If you love me, you shouldn’t worry about these things,’ and that’s when it clicked for me. By the time I realized I was being used, it was too late. Be very careful, I think.
I mean, I think it’s a trust issue in this relationship. If you’re in a relationship, such things shouldn’t be a problem. Does a guy only become a bad person because he might borrow money from you? A person in love shares after all. There’s no need to blow it out of proportion 
They may be someone with an imbalanced budget. Constantly asking for loans and being late doesn’t necessarily mean they have bad intentions, but you’ll struggle in a long-term relationship with someone who lacks financial responsibility. Discuss this openly, and if necessary, offer to help them on how to budget instead of borrowing. If the problem doesn’t improve, it’s a warning sign.
Let me update you: They actually refund a large portion of the money but always delay it. The excuses are like ‘this broke, that came up’. I get a bit uneasy when the money topic comes up, you know? But they are my partner, so I can’t bring it up too often.
Yeah, an ex of one of my friends was always like that too. It started with “a little help,” then turned into bigger “debts.” Luckily, the girl noticed. Honestly, if things are like this, I wouldn’t bother at all; I’d just cut ties. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.