The recent currency increase affected the rent, my roommate doesn't understand

Wasn't it discussed how much each person would pay while shaking hands on the rent agreement with the roommate, and where each person's limits were? Now, with the exchange rate being used as an excuse, it seems that certain things have come to light. I believe there is an aspect of this issue that hasn’t been discussed, which is independent of the exchange rate. The arrangement that was not set up correctly from the beginning might now be more glaring to you.

What about this possibility: The rent increase is a burden that your current arrangement cannot bear, but does he still see it as sustainable? In other words, perhaps you view this situation as a crisis, while he evaluates it at the level of "extra expenses." How can a middle ground be found, and is it possible to maintain this house-sharing arrangement in two different realities?

Just think about this: does this person see the foreign exchange issue or the rent increase as something completely external, adopting a "there's nothing to be done" attitude? In other words, have they entered a state of passive acceptance instead of producing solutions or sharing the burden? In such a case, they won’t act with you; they’ll just focus on their own business and sit idle. Is there this kind of apathy, or is it really a different perspective?

It could also be this: Maybe they don't care about foreign exchange rates, rent, or anything like that; it might not even be on their radar. If there's someone in front of you who doesn't focus on such things in their life, they might be thinking, "You'll figure it out anyway." Just ask directly, "What do you think about these increases, how can we solve this?" You'll clarify things from their response.

Your roommate may not be testing their own limits, meaning they might never have considered how much is too much for them. Now, they might not be fully aware of how this increase is challenging their comfort zone. Have you ever discussed, "What’s the limit for you in this situation?"

Perhaps the issue isn't just the rent, but the alignment between your expectations of him and how he reacts to these situations in life. Is this the case in other areas of his life as well? If he tends to let things flow rather than solve problems, then the issue isn't just the currency increase; this mindset will tire you out in the long run.

I think the real issue here might be this: It seems like your roommate has never really answered the question, "What kind of partner are we in a crisis?" Perhaps the relationship between you has remained in the format of simply "two people living side by side" from the very beginning, with no discussion of joint planning or sharing responsibilities. This may be less about the currency exchange and more about your failure to clarify this "partnership" definition.

Maybe the guy's focus isn't on currency, rent, or anything like that, but completely on your "movement in your own field." Could it be something like this: does your bringing up this issue, your approach, and presenting it entirely as a "problem" push him a bit away? Because some people react to avoid accepting the problem; could there be some stubbornness going on?

Well, what if this person has actually made their own plan but isn't sharing it with you? For example, in their mind, they might have a plan like, "I'll stay a while longer, then I'll leave." But they aren't telling you this because it seems easier to appear laid-back about it. Have you ever considered such a possibility?

Maybe he can cover his share and intends to convince you to take on the rest. My old roommate used to say, "I'm already paying my share, what do I care?" You know, there are people who look at it completely individually and ignore the reality of shared living, could he be one of those?

Maybe your roommate tends to avoid facing these kinds of financial issues instead. They might have that mentality of "if the problem isn’t in front of my eyes, then there’s no problem." Let’s say they are used to this; do they exhibit the same attitude towards other expenses in the house, or is it just about the rent?

In my opinion, beyond the currency or rent issue, your roommate might not be taking the impact of the situation seriously enough. Have you noticed that maybe your reactions are more like "this crisis is escalating" while his reactions are more "it'll get sorted out"? So if there’s a mismatch in the perception of reality, it’s important to clarify that. Does the guy really not understand, or does he just not care?

Has this guy ever dealt with a crisis like this in the past? I mean, it's not just about mindset; sometimes people can completely freeze in a situation where they are inexperienced. Do you remember how he acted during a previous financial issue? Maybe we can get an idea from that.

Maybe the person is planning to move somewhere directly, not because of rising currency rates or rent issues, but is quietly looking for opportunities. If they are waiting for someone else to leave the house, that silence already indicates this. You make plans, and they will become clearer as well.

Did you manage to ask this directly? Like, something open such as "Are you planning to move, or do you have another thought?" If that's what they're saying, I don't understand why this situation is dragging you in. Or are you blowing up from the communication?

Perhaps the issue is entirely his comfort in thinking, "I haven't experienced a bigger crisis, this too shall pass." The increase in currency may still feel very abstract, like rent and so on. Have you ever sat down with concrete calculations, I mean, have you put before your eyes how your expenses have risen? Looking at the situation through numbers might change your reaction.

Well, let's say they don't want to deal with currency or rent increases. In that case, have you suggested increasing their share? Because sometimes people think there's no problem as long as they're paying their share in the "current system." The rising costs may need to be reflected more clearly on their side for them to get involved in the issue. How do they approach this?

There's a chance that the guy is using this increase to squeeze money out of you. In other words, he might be pushing you to take on more by saying, "I'm covering my share, I'm managing it." Have you thought about that? Have you ever tried cornering him by saying openly, "If you're going to increase your share, go ahead, but if not, I'll act accordingly"?

Are there similar loose ends with household bills, grocery expenses, etc.? Because rent is a serious matter, but if he's expecting you to carry him in general, that's his attitude. Or is he just slacking under the rent title? You can figure it out by looking at other things.

And think about this: The guy may be aware, but he might be afraid that if he takes action now, it will affect me even worse. In other words, he's probably worried that "he'll ask for a raise now, then completely wreck my house later." No one feels too comfortable out of the blue in this environment.

Maybe the issue is not about the rent, but rather something else? Is it perhaps experiencing a spiritual disconnection rather than a material one? If they're busy with their own affairs, is there not a sense of stagnation? Could that be what is reflecting from there?

Perhaps the reason it's so comfortable is that you give her space? I mean, you're the one bringing up the increase, you're the one looking for solutions, you're the one feeling disturbed. Has she perhaps switched to a "you talk, I'll listen" mode in this dynamic? If you were to stay silent for a while and completely pass the ball to her, would it change?

When you abstract it this much, I can't help but wonder why you're still keeping the person at home. Things aren't being discussed clearly, there's no accounting or planning, and assumptions are constantly being made. Why don't you ask this: "Are we going to tackle this increase together, or am I the one who's going to handle it?" The answer is important.

There’s one more possibility: Maybe they really don’t have the strength to deal with the increase, but they don’t want to say it. In other words, instead of saying, "I can’t pay my increased share; I’ll move out," they’re gritting their teeth and quietly enduring it. Could you have missed some small clues? For example, has their shopping list gotten shorter, or have they cut back on other expenses? If that’s the case, you might need to bring up the topic and discuss alternatives.

Maybe they don't want to face the increase because they prefer this order to stay the same? In other words, could they be assuming that this will continue by putting a bit more weight on you without risking a move? How much do you think you can push this workload sharing, or was there already such a balance from the start?

I think the main question to ask is: What was your balance like before the rent increase started? If there was already a system where you were carrying more of the load, then it's normal for this situation to continue. But if there was an equal distribution from the beginning, then it’s necessary to question why there has been such a shift. What was the old order, and where did the change start?

Could they be afraid to address this rent directly? I mean, does saying it openly lead to a conflict like, "Okay then, I'll move out"? Because sometimes people choose to just manage the current discomfort rather than find a solution. Do you think there's a kind of passive resistance like this?

Maybe it's not that no one is afraid or passively resisting, but rather that they simply don't care. If they intended to pay, they would have said so already. Are we getting too caught up in overly romantic scenarios like quietly enduring or holding back?

Or maybe the situation is this: Instead of discussing and resolving the increase, they see staying silent as an invitation for "you to solve it." Those with this mindset sometimes wait in a "keep quiet until the problem is solved" mode. Have you tried directly pressing, "Do you have a plan?"

I think the first question is this: How well is this roommate's economic situation and contribution to expenses known? You know, these kinds of situations often come down to class issues. For you, what is an "extra expense" might be a "struggle for survival" for them. Or are they just making a choice, not cutting back but not sharing either? The two scenarios involve very different dynamics.

To be honest, there's also this: Did you ever talk to this person about your spending habits before the rent increase? I mean, was there already a vague system in place from the beginning, or did things just start to go off the rails recently? Because sometimes the foundation of the basic agreement is already flawed, and then when a crisis hits, it falls apart even more.

Maybe we're all looking in the wrong place. Your roommate might be aware of the increase but is downplaying its importance. Is this person thinking, "Is it really worth worrying about for this amount of money?" If they are only comparing the rent to their own income, they might not be empathizing with your budget.

The rent issue is all well and good, but what about the other expenses? Bills, shared shopping, and so on. If there's the same ease with those, it would be inadequate to link the problem solely to the rent increase. If it's only like that for rent, then this would straight up be a "I passed it on to you" move.

Well, if they leave it saying "I transferred it to you" knowing about the rent increase, could they be relying on the fact that you won’t react? In other words, do they have a confident attitude that you will find a solution? Where do they get that confidence from, has something in the past given them this ease?

Maybe it was all about timing. When the increase happened, you noticed it right away and acted, but they either found out late or didn’t prioritize it. People’s tendency to say "we’ll take care of it later" sometimes derails these kinds of matters. Who spoke first after the rent increase, what kind of moment did it create, did they say something in that moment and then go silent, for instance?

Maybe the issue isn't about "understood, did not understand" but rather the question of "why am I hanging this laundry by myself?" I mean, the guy is literally spinning in the washing machine but might be avoiding the clip. Just tighten the line a bit and ask directly; maybe it'll shake off that lazy attitude.

There has been a rent increase; you've solved it, but there seems to be an ongoing unease that won't end with a solution. Is this just a one-time situation, or is it generally your contractor's "we can manage" attitude? If it's always like this, the issue isn't the rent but the expectation of equal sharing.

Your roommate might not care about the increase, fine, but the point I'm stuck on is this: Did you clearly state how much the increase is? Because saying "the rent has increased" is different from saying "we'll pay x more lira." If the amount isn't clear, it's easier for them to find excuses.

I think this guy heard about the increase, but he probably thought, "this will keep getting solved this way." Have you ever tried saying, "there's been this much of a raise, what are you planning to do?" and throwing the ball back at him?

Well, if they're not willing to share the rent completely, have you thought about putting a bit more of the remaining expenses on them? Like, if you tried to establish a balance in electricity, water, and grocery shopping by saying, "Okay, I'll take care of this one, but you handle the others," how did they react?

There's something missing in this story: What's the man's financial situation? For example, is he really at a level where he can't pay, or is it more of a "I could pay, but I don't want to" attitude? Because the reactions would be different in either case.

Ultimately, rent is debatable to a certain extent, but is the issue about money or responsibility? Because "I can't pay" is one thing, while "I won't pay" is entirely a different stance. For instance, does this person easily spend money on something else, or are they generally in a tight spot? Spending priorities are also important here.

Apart from the rent increase, have there been any other disagreements? Because sometimes people act like they are letting things go when they are actually reacting to other accumulated issues. Is it just about money, I'm not sure at the moment.

The question is: Did this rental issue get clarified at first with a written agreement between you, or did you start with a "we'll sort it out" attitude? Because things left ambiguous from the beginning tend to take shape according to personal interpretation later on. If there's no clarity, they may be justified in their own way.

It's strange that your roommate remains indifferent to a definite issue like a rent increase, regardless of their income situation. There might be an expectation of "You'll manage somehow," but you need to ask yourself if you've contributed to that. Is this the first time you're carrying such a burden on your own? If this is a habit, I think the issue isn't the amount but rather that you don't limit your attitude.

Now, even if this friend said "I won't pay" to the rent increase, something else is bothering me: Were there other instances of this kind of evasion during our roommate relationship? Or did this specifically explode over the rent issue? Because sometimes people indulge in one thing while they are actually used to spreading problems, just waiting for an opportunity. Consider their other habits as well. Maybe this is a deeper issue.

So does this guy have a plan for the future behind saying "I won't pay" the rent increase? I mean, has he ever said something like, "I'm in a tough spot right now, but I'll get back on my feet in two months?" Or is it just complete comfort leaning on you? Because there's a difference between the two; one has hope for a solution, the other is just a burden.

What I don't understand is this: If rent increases are affecting your budget, they affect theirs too, right? Is there some special protection shield to make it "less impactful" while incomes are fixed? Or have they quietly consented to you carrying a heavier load from the beginning and are now piling it on even more? It seems strange to me that they are being so passive.

Maybe the guy is thinking something like, "If we sat down and negotiated with the landlord, it wouldn't increase this much," right? So is he wondering if a solution could have been produced instead of just accepting the increase? Or did he just take the easy way out? Did he speak clearly with you?

Did you talk to the landlord one-on-one when discussing this increase, or were they involved too? They might be acting more relaxed because they don't know how the increase was determined or what was discussed there. If there was a communication breakdown from the beginning, it might be easier to brush it off now.

Can she really pay the rent increase, or is she just pretending to be dead? Did she give you any clear information about her income and expenses? Because this "I can’t pay" reaction sometimes comes from genuine inability. Or is it just out of caprice?

Check on the other responsibilities of the friend who says, "this is my "payment" at home, like cleaning and shopping. How do they handle those tasks? If they're always taking shortcuts in those areas too, you're already living with someone who will wear you down in the long run. Even if you talk about the rent, it seems like this mindset isn't going to change. I would suggest looking into other options.

It's important to understand how this friend behaves in expenses outside of rent. For example, how involved is he in shared shopping? Or what was his stance on bills like electricity and water? Because some people show the same attitude not only in large amounts but also in smaller expenses. It wouldn't be unusual to hear someone who says, "I won't pay," later say something like, "I shouldn't cover the electricity this month." Has he developed a habit from the start? That's what to look at.

You had a nice discussion with your roommate... But this guy saying "I won’t pay" so clearly, is he perhaps pondering the legal aspects of the situation? I mean, is he stuck on something like "Is this increase legal or not?" Or is it just plain indifference? Because if he's putting up such a resistance even regarding the rent, he might give you a headache during the exit process as well. Clear it up, because this confusion could become costly.

If this "payment" term only relates to the rent increase, can it be reflected in other general expenses of the house? I mean, let's say you took on the increase, won't your budget also tighten, requiring them to contribute more for things like shopping, cleaning, and bills? Or will they say "It's not my problem" there too? This feels like an incomplete equation.

Someone who comes with such clarity about their "payment" probably carried this attitude potentially even before the increase. Weren't these calculations made when entering the first rental? Perhaps they initially showed good intentions and later changed their stance. I would really take a look at their income and expenses to try to understand if they're just making excuses or if they're truly in despair. But I wouldn't spend too long in this process because once trust is fragile, it's hard to rebuild.

Now I'm going to ask you something: is the person who says "my payment" really capable and mature enough to discuss a rent increase in the same room as you? Or are they showing childish stubbornness like "I said it this way, it should be this way"? Because at this point, it seems more about the balance of power between you two than the debate of whether it's "legal or not".

Okay, did you clarify the situation while discussing this increase, or did you leave it vague because you didn't want to "rock the boat"? Because sometimes people take your indecision as a cue and can just cut it off by saying "I won't pay." If the conversation wasn't balanced from the start, it's reasonable to expect it to turn into a standoff now.

While the issue of rent increases may seem like an economic problem on its own, I think the real question is how well the person has adapted to a shared living culture. Because the term "I won't pay" is not only about money, it also reflects the respect for shared responsibility. I wonder, would the same conversation happen in another country - say in Germany or Japan - in the same way? Is this easy way of drawing a line due to a greater tolerance for individual interests taking precedence over the common order? What do you think?

I think instead of discussing this from a single person's perspective, we should look into whether an agreement was made collectively when such an increase decision was taken in general. If it wasn't discussed from the very beginning, the current "my payment" response would create more of a gap. If there was a clear agreement, then whether they relied on that is also important. Who is thinking, "It was discussed this way at the start, but the conditions have changed"?

Was there at least a written decision or a mutually agreed agreement made before the rent increase? If everything is just "verbal," this discussion will remain open-ended forever. Although, even if it were written, it seems this person has the potential to complicate things further with their stubbornness of "I won't pay this." Did they pay their rent regularly in the past, or have they always had an excuse?

Bro, is it really necessary to give a detailed explanation to someone who says "I can't pay"? After all, there's a reality of rent increases, and it's not just a choice. I would just come out and ask, "What are you going to do, we can't continue under these conditions?" Let's see how serious they are.

Is what she referred to as "the payment" just a rent increase, or is she questioning your overall financial arrangement? Because sometimes there are accumulated other grievances behind such words. For example, could she feel cheated regarding the other expenses of the house? This kind of clear resistance struck me as if something is about to explode.

Let's be clear, the tone of the phrase "I can't pay" is just as important as the rent increase itself. Is this guy saying it to corner you, or is he expressing helplessness? Is he defensive while speaking, or is he challenging you? Clarify these points, and then make your move accordingly.

Is there really any point in having a conversation with someone who says "I don’t owe you anything"? I mean, if there’s such a clear refusal, why are you exhausting yourself still trying to negotiate? They’ve chosen their corner, so you should draw your own path; if necessary, play the separation card openly. There’s no such thing as "shared life" anymore anyway.

Everyone is fixated on the "I can’t pay" statement, but no one has asked: How much is the rent increase? Is this figure realistic compared to the current budget, or did you throw in a rather challenging number? Because the economic balance is already fragile, and if an "unacceptable" figure has been pulled in on top of that, it might have crashed directly into the wall.

Was the rent increase proportional to the foreign currency or was it completely arbitrary? If you say it was tied to the exchange rate, then they could justifiably ask, "Why am I suddenly being burdened with something that is unrelated to me?" Wouldn't it have been clearer if you had agreed on a fixed percentage and discussed it from the beginning?

It seems like this "payment" statement is a bit of a way to carve out some space for oneself. So, could it actually be referring to the internal strain related to the budget rather than just the increase? You can think of it like a sock trapped in a washing machine; the more it spins, the louder it gets, but its real problem is not being able to find a way out. Maybe you could sit down together and review the budget?

The idea of reviewing the budget is nice, but it alone is not enough, as it seems that there is also the issue of "shared responsibility" involved. Is someone who says they won't pay planning to directly push this increase onto you, or is there a chance they might come with a suggestion like, "What can we do together to cover this?" If there is no intention to contribute at all, it could signal not just economic issues, but also a failure in collaboration.

No one has questioned this: Is this "payment" remark a last-minute thing, or were there small signals before the rent increase? Because if this is a completely surprising reaction, there may have been a significant communication gap for a long time. Generally, accumulated situations tend to explode suddenly.

Well, besides the increase in rent, my question is this: Does this "payment" tone generally indicate that he tends to avoid responsibilities related to the house? Or is he usually someone who takes responsibility and is consistent? Because it's not just about the money; you also need to see how much his habits and attitude align with communal living.

Can I ask you something? Have you ever questioned the meaning behind the word "payment"? For example, is there a decrease in their own income, are they prioritizing something else, what are they doing with this money? Or do they think this increase is unjust? How can you clarify what reaction to have without knowing the reason?

If they say no to the payment, that's fine, but take a step to understand their intention. Are they rejecting the increase so it won’t set a precedent, or is it purely due to a lack of budget? Because it seems like you'll need to discuss not just the money, but the dynamics behind it.

Okay, but does this "payment" remark stand alone as a bold statement, or did they later backtrack saying "I didn't mean it that much"? Because just like people can have the courage to face things, they can also be pretty good at avoiding responsibility. I think you should pay close attention to what they put out there from the beginning.

If they say they can't pay, it might raise some questions about the sense of fairness in the situation. For instance, is the rent increase truly something they can handle, or has it not been shared evenly from the start? Sometimes people stand their ground where they feel justified; you need to consider whether this justification really needs to be shared.

After saying "I won't pay", was there any reaction regarding other household expenses? For example, are they still contributing the same towards electricity, water, and maintenance fees, or is there a general withdrawal? Because it's not just about the rent increase; how they approach the entire system is important here.

I think there is also a bit of a "cultural" aspect behind this. I mean, people see sharing a house as just an economic solution, but there is such a thing as a culture of communal living. If a guy says "I won't pay," he hasn't adopted this culture at all. If from the very beginning he has been doing everything his own way, then this last incident may have just been a trigger. Did you notice something like this, or was it always harmonious?

But here's the thing: Could this "payment" remark be a reaction from someone who doesn't know their rights as a tenant? If they've never experienced such an increase before and don't know how it works, or how to negotiate, they might be insisting on it simply because they completely see it as unfair. You need to thoroughly elaborate on the topic and clarify the reasons.

Could it be implying something about your income? Is there a mindset like "you earn more, so you pay" going on in their head? Some people don't say things like this directly but make you feel it. Have you sensed such an atmosphere at all?

Forget about his statement; did he ever offer his own alternative? For example, did he say something like "I'll pay this much" or "let's consider a solution like this"? Because if it's just a rejection, fine, but we also need to question the lack of any suggestions.

Perhaps the "I won't pay" reaction isn't directly related to an economic issue, but rather an expression of accumulated dissatisfaction due to another matter. In other words, was there an unresolved, unspoken issue between you before? I think it's important to clarify this.

So did this "payment" remark refer to something specific to you, or was it more of a general objection? In other words, is there a personal tension regarding this matter, or is it purely responding to an external issue? That's important.

Maybe when he says "I'll pay" he's testing you. You know, just to see how much he'll push. Have you ever gotten into this kind of thing in discussions before?

Maybe the "payment" remark is just a tactic to draw attention. Could it be that they feel unnoticed in other domestic matters, thinking they're in the background? For example, have you ever felt that they ignored previous contributions, responsibilities, or conflicts?

The phrase "I won't pay" feels a bit like a challenge. It’s like measuring how much you can push someone, where you will give in? If power struggles have started with someone in a rental arrangement, there won't be any peace left in that home. Why don't you openly question why you feel so comfortable saying that?

"How many rent increases occurred until they said 'I can't pay'? Is there something accumulated before this recent incident? Or is this the first outburst? Because if they remained silent in the past, this could also be an explosion."

Yeah, my brother, does this person just go on with their life as if nothing happened after saying "my payment"? I mean, when you bump into them in the kitchen while making tea, isn't this topic discussed at all? If they make such a big fuss and then just hang around silently, it seems like there's some kind of "bullying" tactic at play.

But isn't it also important how you reacted after saying the word "payment"? Did you go straight to negotiation there, or did you set a clear boundary? Because if the guy says this comfortably, maybe he wants to gauge your attitude.

My old roommate had a similar situation as well. They didn't say "I won't pay" but were always trying to postpone the expenses, and then I realized they had debts to someone else but weren't being straightforward with me. Maybe your friend has another financial issue, but they might be embarrassed to talk about it. I think you should ask them directly.

Did anything else change after you said "I won't pay"? For example, did they start acting differently in terms of shared shopping, meal order, household arrangement, etc.? Because sometimes that kind of statement isn't just a legitimate outburst, but part of a broader attempt at "claiming space." Look into whether this issue is independent, or if it signals something else.

The phrase "I won't pay" might seem like a big statement by itself, but if it has never been clearly expressed before, it’s important to be cautious. There may be some long-standing issues, or some other change has caused this situation. Look into whether there has been a job change recently, if their income has decreased, or if there are personal life troubles. But on the other hand, if this is an attitude of "let's see what will happen," you must stay firm in this situation. Being too accommodating can lead to complications.

"I can't pay" he says, but could he possibly be trying to backtrack slowly over time? You know, if he initially reacts strongly and then starts saying things like "Okay, I'll pay this much this month" and so on, that could just be a bargaining tactic. If you sense these kinds of small attempts to evade, you've got to draw a clear line there so it doesn't turn into outright insolence.

If they say "I won't pay," and you suddenly responded in a solution-focused way, they might see that response as an opportunity. Haven't you shown that you have a grasp of the subject? What you need here is a clear inquiry like "What basis do you have for not paying?" It seems like they've found a comfortable gap to maneuver.

If they clearly said "I'm not paying" and you're still in a situation of no response, isn't that a bit of a power vacuum? I mean, if you also have a share in the rent, you're directly affected here, so why has this become such a vague issue? Speak plainly: Ask, "What do you plan to do about this?" If you don't take a direct stance, everyone is just floating in the air.

If they said "I won't pay" and you’re still living in that house without resolving this conflict, the interesting part is this: the lack of resolution becomes your norm, not theirs. Did this person really propose a clear solution? Or is the situation completely unresolved? If no solution was presented, then it just looks like a "rebellion."

When she said "I owe you", was there any written communication, for example? If you talked on WhatsApp or via message or something, it’s useful to keep those kinds of things. If you find yourself in a difficult situation tomorrow or the day after, these things can serve as proof, because verbal confrontations generally fade away.

The phrase "I won't pay" isn't always a definitive statement; sometimes it's just confusion. In other words, if they don't really have such a clear intention, they just say "I won't pay" and move on. But if the matter is something special, why don't you just come out and talk? Ask, "Is this a problem or a choice?" so that you can find the right solution.

The phrase "I can’t afford it" might also hold a class-based tension behind it. If there is a difference between your income and theirs, this is not just a personal standoff; it can contain a reaction like, "Why am I the one bearing the burden of a system that raises rent this much?" That’s why it may be necessary to expand the question beyond just the axis of "is it a choice or a struggle" and consider the point of "is our arrangement for sharing this house fair?"

Is she still sitting at home after saying "I won't pay"? Because, you know, the next step after that sentence should be to get up and leave, and if she's not leaving, that's where the problem starts. She's not leaving the house, but if she's not paying your rent either, I think it's better to focus on actions rather than words.

Is your roommate doing this for the first time, or do they have a history of saying "I won't pay" and then acting as it suits them? If this is a habit, then the conversation won't have much meaning