Weâve been together for three years, our relationship is going well, but lately, whenever the topic of marriage comes up, he always has a tendency to change the subject. Iâve started to think about our future, but Iâm afraid he might feel uncomfortable. Do you think I should talk more openly about this, or should I wait a little longer and not push it?
I think if a man has been in a relationship for 3 years and still isnât thinking about marriage, he should clearly say so. In our culture, even families would get involved in such a situation. Your patience is normal, but if he is serious now, he should make that clear.
My daughter, 3 years is a very long time. If she were my daughter, I would just ask, âWhat are your intentions, son?â So donât waste time with these indirect conversations because your future is more important.
Thereâs something strange here, but I canât pinpoint the exact reason. Maybe there are other life plans, perhaps hesitations due to family or a past relationship. But itâs odd not to speak openly; I think thereâs something more behind this.
Attachment styles can lead to significant differences in relationships. Someone with an avoidant attachment style may feel uncomfortable with discussions about marriage and may therefore withdraw. If you want clarity, try expressing how you feel without putting pressure on them.
I would also like to add this: Actually, there isnât a problem in our relationship in general, I feel loved. But whenever I bring up the topic of marriage, either he says, âWeâll think about it in time,â or he changes the subject. I really canât understand whether he is someone who is distant about marriage or if he just doesnât want to speak clearly.
You say that there are no issues in our relationship, but if a person is constantly changing the subject, it means there is discomfort somewhere. Have you allowed them to express themselves? Maybe theyâre avoiding talking because they feel some underlying pressure.
The main issue is this: Do you know what you want? If youâre looking for a definite marriage plan, walking this path with this guy may not be right for you. But if youâre saying, âas long as the relationship continues,â then this way of doing things is also a choice. The choice is yours, not his.