I've never really had a big problem with my face, but my mom keeps saying that I need to get a nose filler. She keeps bringing it up like it's something she really wants. I'm happy with my natural look, but on the other hand, I'm starting to wonder if she's right. Should I get it done, or should I not do it just because my mom wants me to?
It's really harsh when a mother says "The nation only sees your flaws when it looks at you," it directly destroys a person's self-confidence. A similar situation happened to my friend with her mother; she was always saying her chin was too recessed. She went and got it done, but later she said, "Did I want it, or did my mom make the decision? It's all mixed up now." So, don't jump into it without being really sure.
I understand what it feels like to be in that situation. It's confusing when someone always wants to fix things while a person is content with their natural state. My mom used to pressure me to shape my eyebrows, and when I finally did, she said, 'Look how much prettier you are now.' I call that an ‘a mother’s perspective,’ as it could be something she imagines based on her own preferences. But if you’re happy, I think you should move from that point.
I definitely agree that your mom is hurting you, but on the other hand, we should also consider this: Maybe she wants to see you in a much better place and didn't mean to hurt you, but rather to motivate you. You say your mom keeps bringing this up; have you ever seriously sat down and said, 'I don't want this' or 'I'm feeling uncertain because of you'? Maybe as long as you're not speaking clearly, she is trying to talk about it.
Nose fillers have become quite a popular procedure now, but the decision shouldn’t just be based on physical appearance. The fillers can dissolve and revert back in 1-2 years, so it’s not a permanent solution. If you want to try it, it might be comforting for you to start, but if you do it just because someone else wants you to, there's a high chance you'll regret it in the long run.
I forgot to add this: I've told my mom clearly a few times, "I love my natural face," and all that, but she brings it up again within 10 days. I actually felt pretty good about myself, but the phrase "People see flaws" really stuck with me. Either I'm exaggerating, or my mom sees things more clearly; I don't know. I'm really struggling in front of the mirror these days.
A person's body or face is not a "project" that anyone can discuss or want to change. Mothers can also, unintentionally, continue the pressure of some old roles. Yes, maybe your mother didn't say it with a bad intention, but that doesn't change the fact that it applies pressure on your decisions and stance. It's important to clearly set boundaries with someone who is trying to push you.
