My boyfriend sent a friend request to one of his ex-flings while scrolling through social media one day. He told me about it as if it were a very innocent thing, but honestly, I don’t feel comfortable at all. Why did he feel the need to do that? Do you think I should question it or just consider it a trivial detail?
7 Answers
7I went through the same thing. My boyfriend had added his ex-girlfriend at one point. He said to me, ‘Why are you making such a big deal out of it?’ Two weeks later, I found out they were messaging each other. Honestly, I just broke up with him right then and there. Trust was gone; it doesn’t come back.
I think you should sit down and talk clearly. Ask, ‘Why did you add that? Was it really something innocent?’ If they’re giving silly answers, there might be some unfinished business in the past or a lack of respect for your boundaries. Just be direct, open, and honest; no need to prolong it 
While this may seem like a personal space issue, it has the potential to turn into a lack of trust. If your partner is somehow tied to their past relationships, it may indicate that the boundaries in your new relationship are not clear. It is important to openly share your feelings. If you do not turn this into an argument, you will achieve healthy results.
I already asked this, but let me add something like this; they told me that this person is something like a ‘friend’ for them. But at the same time, they also talked about some flirting processes from the past. Now I don’t know how to separate the two.
I don’t understand, are you going to let anyone add? When you say, ‘Should I take note of who I’m going to add?’ I will side with them. The past is the past. If you start questioning every move, then the relationship won’t work anyway.
I feel like there’s something going on here. Why would an old fling come up out of nowhere? It’s also kind of strange how they present it as if it’s innocent, almost like they’re trying to defend themselves. I think you should check if you’ve last seen or messaged that person 
I know your stomach must be turning when you hear that request. Especially when they explain it as if it’s normal, it shows a direct need for defense. But as long as you don’t speak openly and clearly, that feeling won’t go away; instead, the discomfort will grow inside you. If what you consider a boundary isn’t one for them, you’ll start to feel worse without resolving it.