The other day, while chatting with a friend, our salary levels came up—sorry, I mean, it became a topic of discussion. When I learned that my salary is higher than theirs, they started making sarcastic remarks like, ‘Of course, you’re wealthy,’ and ‘Just stay out of our lower-level jobs.’ I started feeling really uncomfortable. Do you think I should bring it up and talk about it, or should I just let it go and continue without reacting?
I experienced the same thing at my old job when my salary was found out; one person kept saying, ‘You practically count as our boss.’ At first, I didn’t say anything, but then I couldn’t take it anymore. One day while getting coffee, he asked, ‘Why are you waiting in line? Do the rich get their coffee separately?’ I casually replied, ‘Yes, the rich’s line ends faster.’ From that day on, he stopped the conversation.
I think you should express this discomfort directly and calmly. If you say, ‘This bothers me, please avoid these jokes from now on,’ the other person will feel like the ball is in their court, no matter what they do. If you stay quiet, it will just prolong the situation.
Maybe you spoke incorrectly about the salary issue. You know, usually no one just comes and asks out of the blue, or makes a jab. Perhaps you said something about their workload or salary without realizing it, and that’s why they reacted that way.
In such situations, corporate ethics come into play. Normally, salaries are not disclosed to anyone, and care should be taken in individual conversations as well. This can create unrest in the workplace. You can try to resolve the situation by consulting the HR department.
I thought about it a bit, and I think you may be right. I probably brought up my salary too much without realizing it; in a conversation, I said something like, ‘Yeah, it’s tough to save with this salary.’ That’s how it all started. Maybe I can take a step back and say, ‘It’s not right for me to talk about anyone’s salary.’
Why are you telling your salary, daughter? People get jealous right away. My mom always used to say, ‘Don’t share your money or earnings with anyone.’ Even in the neighborhood, if you spent 10 lira more, people would start talking. It’s the same in that workplace.
You earned your money rightfully; no one can question someone else’s salary and make jabs. You’ll have to draw a line there. You can say, ‘This topic is closed; otherwise, I’m uncomfortable,’ and that’s it.
Does the friend always say these kinds of sarcastic things, or is it limited to just a few times? To understand the level of discomfort, how often do they repeat it exactly?