I have a manager at work who constantly throws little jabs my way. It feels like if I were to argue with him, I would suffer some backlash, but when I keep it inside, it seems like he pushes more. Do you think I should keep on staying quiet or should I say something? What do you do in such situations?
I think you shouldn’t stay silent. They gain an advantage by throwing in those remarks. As long as you don’t react, they’ll become even bolder. But don’t engage in a debate; just give a slightly sarcastic response, like “I didn’t quite understand what you meant by that.” Do this a couple of times, and they might back off.
The constant snide remarks from the back manager may border on mobbing. Consider leaving a note for human resources, but make sure to have a witness. They won’t take action without a witness anyway. If you’re thinking of legal action, you should consult an employment law attorney first.
Why don’t you turn a bit towards yourself? You said you’re always getting jabs, but maybe you’re misinterpreting some things. If you’re choosing silence, it might have its consequences after all. I mean, you can’t just think everyone is throwing jabs, try to adapt in some way.
The situation you mentioned at work is common; it’s called ‘psychological harassment’ or mobbing. I’m not a lawyer or a doctor, but pay attention to writing down the signs: what time it was, in what environment, and exactly what was said. These details will be important in the process of seeking justice.
Let me also point out that the jabs happen one-on-one; the other employees usually don’t notice. Even if I’m not the direct target in an incident, there are insinuations like, “Some people still haven’t learned to do their job.” It’s a constantly annoying situation.
This is clearly an imbalance of power. That person is pushing your boundaries, and you can’t react because you’re thinking, “if I argue, I’ll get hurt.” But by staying silent, you’re not acting justly. Whether in a one-on-one conversation or by reporting it, don’t let them think that remaining quiet will make you right.
I think no matter what happens, focus on your own work at the workplace. Don’t get involved in gossip or carry words around. People might throw comments here and there, but if you don’t give them any ground, it’ll fade away. Starting an argument could even cause you to lose your position; is it easy to find a job these days?
My daughter, no one has the right to wear you down. A person should have some pride. If I were you, I would go and tell them to their face, ‘You keep trying to crush me, but I’m aware of it.’ If you can’t even do that, then you seriously need to report the situation to a higher authority.