I recently started a new job, and it feels like a colleague in the team is constantly making plays against me. For example, in meetings, they mimic something I said afterward or talk in a suggestive way, like âyouâre new, youâll get used to it.â I laughed it off a couple of times, but now Iâm seriously uncomfortable. Are they just messing around, or are they trying to intimidate me? How can I resolve a situation like this? Should I talk to them, or should I go to HR?
I think you should talk directly. After the meeting or during a coffee break, ask something like, âI find your jokes a bit strange, whatâs your intention?â Give him a chance first instead of going straight to HR. He might not even be aware of it.
But hereâs the thing: As a beginner, are you perhaps being a bit sensitive to small jokes? I donât think saying âYouâre not used to this paceâ is meant with bad intentions.
Such situations usually start with boundary violations in team dynamics. You should approach it with a professional tone to set your boundaries and clarify the situation by saying something like, âThese types of jokes can be uncomfortable for me.â You should try this step before considering a formal written complaint about the workplace.
I also want to add that, actually, I didnât push it too hard at first, but it feels intentional to me. When I see things like âyour new friendâs adaptation will take a bit longerâ even in group messages, it really makes me uncomfortable.
To be honest, if youâre a relaxed and confident person, youâll probably stop this without even realizing it. If you exaggerate and immediately start complaining, youâll look worse. I think you should gauge your reactions a bit. 