My friend didn't think the outfit I liked suited me.

Fashion & Style
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1

I showed a piece of clothing I liked on Instagram to my friend. While talking, she said, “It might not look good on your body. Look for something different.” I don’t think she meant any harm, but I felt like she indirectly criticized my physique. What do you think I should say if something like this happens again?

2

It’s been a long time since I’ve had things like this happen to me. Once, while I was choosing my graduation gown, my friend said, ‘Don’t let your shoulders look too broad.’ It really got me down. But later I realized that sometimes people can hurt you without even noticing. You could say you totally brought down my mood, I think :smiling_face_with_tear:

3

Is your friend always this straightforward, or do you think they said it this way just for you?

4

@uykuarasi usually speaks frankly, but it seems like they’re a bit softer with other friends.

5

I think if you’re hung up on this, you’re in for a tough time. Shouldn’t people be honest? There’s no rule that everyone has to tell white lies :slightly_smiling_face:

6

@aklimkaldi if you refer to others as softer, it feels a bit like this
 maybe they think it won’t affect your strength, or they are speaking comfortably because of the familiarity between you.

7

@makarnaoncesi honesty is important, but you can do it without being hurtful. If you interpret it as something like ‘your body is bad’, it can really hurt someone’s feelings, and that’s valid.

8

Honestly, it’s normal to give suggestions that match body types when it comes to clothing choices, but the way you say it is important. There’s a way to talk like, ‘it might not suit you, something else might look better,’ and then there’s saying ‘it doesn’t look good.’ A bit of sensitivity is required in friendships :flushed_face:

9

I don’t think there is any bad intent, but the way it was expressed is poor :slightly_smiling_face:

10

It looks like an empty topic from here, but sometimes we get really hung up on these little things, right? Everyone goes through that.

11

Maybe there’s a bit of a competitive vibe in the dynamic between you two and you aren’t even aware of it? Think about it, would you react the same way if someone else made the comments he does? Sometimes it feels like the people we know say things more harshly.