I've gathered a lot of motivation, I’m losing weight nicely, but my boyfriend keeps saying, 'Let’s order a dessert, it won't hurt.' Honestly, I'm tired of resisting every single time. I don’t want to say something bad, but does he not want me to lose weight? Or does he really not care? Do you think this is jealousy, or am I just overthinking it?
What kind of logic is this? It's basically like sabotaging. My partner kept ordering burgers and stuff while I was on a diet. When I mentioned it, they would say, 'Come on, we don't eat it every day.' I'm sorry, but I really think this is inconsiderate.
'It'll be fine, just this once,' he says... He used to say the same thing to me. Then those 'just this once' turned into a huge list. You definitely need to set a limit, or this just never ends.
Speak directly. Say that you want to lose weight, that it's your goal, and that you expect support. Make it clear that you won't join her if she orders sweets. In other words, you can be a bit strict, but it works 🫢
Let me tell you something, but don't get mad... I think you're exaggerating a bit too. It's something sweet that makes people happy, and they want to share it. Your partner isn't necessarily being malicious, maybe you're just perceiving the situation too sensitively? 😬
Actually, the issue here isn't directly about "dessert," but the support you receive in the process of reaching your goal. You need to talk about this with your partner and find a way to compromise together. Psychologically, the phrase "one time won't hurt" is a common resistance breaker, so be mindful of this.
Update: Thanks for the comments. Honestly, I started writing a bit angrily, maybe I'm just sensitive, I don't know. This morning, they said 'let's eat a waffle,' and I said it sounded a bit jealous because, I don't know, why would you push me when I'm motivated?
Now let me say this from a guy's perspective: sometimes it's just completely innocent moments, he just wants to eat something and doesn’t like being alone. But on the other hand, he might actually be envious of your commitment to the diet. So it's possible that he wants to overshadow your success 🫠
I think, for instance, they might be saying those sweets particularly to undermine your weight loss process. But there could be other things behind this as well. For example, consider whether your transformation threatens them.
The issue here isn't sweetness; it's the dynamics of the relationship. Disrespecting the goals you set for yourself is a serious matter. A partner without support can overshadow your efforts. Don't allow that, stand your ground. Weakening is your decision, not theirs.
