I started having contractions tonight, and when they began to come regularly, I got worried. I told my wife, “You don’t look that bad, I’ll take my bag and go to my mom’s, you can call me later.” I was shocked, I froze in place. On one hand, it’s my first birth, and I’m panicking; on the other hand, his thoughtless behavior really upset me. Fortunately, I managed to convince him to stay somehow, but this incident stuck with me. How will I talk after the birth, what should I do?
9 Answers
9“Don’t worry, I’ll be back before the pains get better.” If I said this to someone, they would probably divorce me before giving birth. What kind of mindset is that? Are they going to take the child to its mother afterwards?
The panic during the first birth is already scary enough. On top of that, acting like this is just a joke. I mean, what does it even mean to just leave, even if you’re not there until morning? I’m still shocked.
Does she live in the same neighborhood as her mother to be this comfortable? What would have happened if she really had called when she left? There was traffic at that moment, it was nighttime… zero logic.
As a free individual, he has the right to go to his mother, but you also have the right to stay by her side during childbirth. This is a matter of boundaries, it’s not a thoughtless class situation. Speak openly 
Let me say something from the perspective of the male side: sometimes we really panic and want to distance ourselves from someone who is bringing us down. It may seem funny, but perhaps it was done out of anxiety.
There used to be stories about how my husband would never let go of my wife’s hand; well, those people from back then are no longer around. We’re running around for everything but each other. What a pity 
I said I wouldn’t go. That’s it.
@denizce if they are having children without tolerating this anxiety, what’s the point if they’re going to leave them alone in times of crisis? In my opinion, there’s no excuse.
In this case, the lack of communication is prominent. The man might be looking for a solution from his mother in a situation where he “doesn’t know what to do,” but he can’t tell his wife this. Honestly admitting that he feels stuck would make more sense, wouldn’t it?