Hello girls, although my boyfriend and I are thinking seriously about our relationship, he is quite relaxed about protection, and honestly, it's making me uncomfortable. Every time he says, 'there's no need, it will be fine,' but deep down, I'm feeling tense. Is it right to stay silent about these things, or should I speak up openly? Am I the only one who is sensitive?
I was in the same situation too. My partner always said, 'Nothing will happen,' but I never felt at ease. In the end, I said it clearly, 'Even if nothing happens to you, my body is at risk.' At first, they objected, but when I stood firm, they accepted it. Seriously, just say what’s on your mind directly; overthinking it wears you out more.
The same thing happened to me, but it was at a more advanced level. Once, they just brushed it off saying, 'it's no big deal, there are medications anyway.' But I decided to talk with the doctor and made it clear that I would not take on direct protection; I said it openly. It's tough at first, but you have to be clear for your own health.
It's important to clearly express discomfort in this situation because if full protection is neglected, there's a risk of diseases including HIV, not just pregnancy. If there's a detail you're unsure about, visit a gynecologist; sometimes consulting a specialist convinces the partner as they take it more seriously.
To be honest, it seemed a bit too sensitive. Maybe they trust you or don't see it as that bad. If there was a problem, they would take it seriously. If you're feeling directly uneasy, wouldn't it be clearer to take a test or something? Maybe that would ease your mind.
Actually, it feels more sensitive than I expected; you are right. I'm hesitant to say it because I don't want it to be perceived as blaming him, but I think I need to talk about it this way. The idea of referring him to a doctor seems reasonable; I will try to add that.
Is your partner very experienced in this way? Sometimes, those who are so relaxed tend to take a lot of risks in their previous relationships. Those who say things like 'there won't be any problems' usually go smoothly for a while but then get used to it. I definitely suggest you talk about this because it seems like there’s some other kind of comfort here.
Look, dear, the issue here is not just about protection, it's about health and trust. If someone insists on something that bothers you, that relationship won't be very solid. If you were my daughter, I would set a clear boundary at that point. Say, look, I don't want to take a risk, and if he doesn't understand, he's the wrong guy anyway.
