I finally received an overseas job offer that really excites me, but my partner hasn’t been supportive at all. They said, 'You'll earn money and end up alone, is it worth it?' Honestly, it confused me. I want to go, but it makes me feel selfish. What would you do?
I experienced something similar with my spouse. I had received a job offer from Canada, and I was really excited, but my spouse wasn't supportive and kept trying to choose the safe side. I went for it, we struggled a bit, but in the end, they moved in with me. Maybe over time their opinion will change as well.
I experienced the same thing. My boyfriend kept speaking negatively, saying, 'Are you really going to find peace there?' But I think it might be that the idea of everything changing is disturbing them out of fear. Still, the decision is yours 😅
Sure, but deciding to "I want to go" without considering shaping your future with the person you love is a bit selfish, isn't it? If you're leaving them out of it like this, you shouldn't be surprised if they feel hurt.
There is an important concept in career decisions; while a change of position may be challenging in the short term, it can contribute to both your relationships and personal development in the long run. However, if there is a lack of communication, problems can escalate under these new conditions. Perhaps it is time to discuss and start a common future plan.
Let me also add that I connected his saying "you will be alone" to the loneliness of work, but it seemed a bit about his own loneliness as well. Because when I mentioned the offer, he immediately said, "Okay, but what will I do there?" In other words, he seems to have an attitude that he is not thinking of going.
So, has a topic like a long-term relationship come up among you? What does he think about how the path will be drawn for you after this overseas job?
These kinds of reactions happen very often. In fact, it's more about the feeling of "where do I fit into his/her plans" than loneliness. You want to leave, and he/she doesn’t want to stay. Maybe if this issue had been discussed earlier, there could have been more openness.
"It’s very sad to say that you will be left alone." This sentence is quite upsetting. Because when taking such a big step regarding your career, you need support and encouragement by your side. Especially for someone to crush your enthusiasm... It feels like one's dreams are literally being suffocated.
Everyone is making wonderful career plans here, but nobody is asking what will happen to this man's feeling of loneliness when you leave? "Your dream, your plan" is nice, but the real aspect of being a partner is being tested here. Otherwise, everyone can do it on their own anyway.
