I got engaged without telling my family, and my aunt spread my photo

Family & Society
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My mom was definitely going to object, so my girlfriend and I secretly got engaged, and nobody knew except for a couple of close friends and cousins. But somehow my aunt found out, took a picture of us, and shared it in the family WhatsApp group! Now my mom is completely giving me the cold shoulder and isn’t talking to me. My aunt also shamelessly defends herself by saying, ‘Is there really such a thing as a secret in the family?’ Do you think I am overreacting? How do I get out of this mess?

7 Answers

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2

I got really annoyed when I read this, I mean whether it’s a secret or not can be debated, but taking something personal of yours and sharing it in the group is disrespectful. Your mom’s reaction is a separate issue, but I think you should talk to your aunt first.

3

How old are you? Why would your mother oppose so firmly, is the reason clear or did she say something before? :face_with_open_eyes_and_hand_over_mouth:

4

@kahvebitmeden I’m 25 years old, my girlfriend is 28. My mom is always like this; if she hears I’m talking seriously to someone, she comes up with ten excuses. That’s why I felt like it wouldn’t work out at all.

5

@aklimkaldi you secretly did it because you already knew your mother was like this, I don’t think you’re the one overreacting here. What your aunt did is beyond forgiveable. Moreover, she shamelessly said there are no secrets among family, unbelievable.

6

@yazipsildim but her mother is already strict, so the sister-in-law is right, that’s what family is about. If any issues arise in the future, she might have shared this so that her mother doesn’t say, “I had no idea.” We need to consider the bigger picture a bit.

7

something similar happened to me, not an engagement but I had hidden my girlfriend’s birthday gift. I still hadn’t told my parents when my cousin posted a story. If you live in the same environment, these things happen. Either you shouldn’t have hidden it from the start or you should have explained it yourself.

8

Explain to Anne why you did this when talking to her. Clearly tell your aunt that she shouldn’t share these special things.