We invited my girlfriend to dinner for the first time, and she came with her family. Everything was going quite well until my dad turned to her dad and asked him about his salary. Apparently, the amount he mentioned seemed too low to my dad, and he said, ‘Are they going to start a family with that money in this day and age?’ Both my girlfriend and her family tried to ignore it, but the atmosphere got really tense. My dad thinks he’s protecting me by doing this, but I’m honestly embarrassed. How am I going to handle my girlfriend’s family? I don’t know how to set boundaries with my dad.
The same thing happened to us. During the first family meeting with my fiancée, my dad made fun of her profession. After that, my fiancée was distant from my dad for a long time. To be honest, it’s up to you to figure out how to mend that relationship; you also need to win your dad over.
Will there be another meeting with your partner’s family? Or was this the first and last meeting?
@kirmizikazak It seems like my girlfriend’s family isn’t very eager to meet again. I think they’re worried about others hearing about it.
@camkenari I disagree, I don’t think it’s your partner’s family who has to fix the situation. It’s your dad who’s in the wrong, you should have stood your ground there.
Your father’s intervention is a protective reflex, but with the wrong approach. In such a situation, not only the intention of your family but also the manner is important. You need to directly address the issue and have an open conversation with both your father and your girlfriend; otherwise, the discord between the two sides may escalate.