My spouse wants me to have cosmetic surgery, do you think they're right?

Body & Self-Confidence
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1

My spouse has suggested several times that I should consider getting a nose job. To be honest, this hurt me a little, but on the other hand, I think, if something like this would make me happier, why not? I’m really confused; what would you do in a situation like this? Is it just about aesthetics, or are there other things at play in your opinion?

9 Answers

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2

Did your spouse say this directly or just hint at it indirectly? Because I think the matter changes depending on how it was said. If they’re directly saying “get a nose job,” that’s a pretty big problem, but maybe if they just said something like “it would be better for you,” their intention could be to support you?

3

Let me be clear, I see a lot of people around me getting aesthetic procedures done, and most of them say they did it for someone else first, and then they end up saying ‘I liked it more for myself.’ But still, what’s important is how you feel first. If you make a decision just based on what they said, you might regret it later.

4

I need to speak frankly now; if your spouse said something, did you lose confidence in yourself as they said it, or did you already feel some inadequacy in this regard? Because maybe you might be blowing this a bit out of proportion. Everything doesn’t end with your spouse, you know.

5

I don’t understand. Is marriage run like this with pressures? Were there such things in the old days? Why not try to be happy with each other’s true selves instead? Don’t go overboard trying to improve things and end up making it worse.

6

So you’re saying your spouse has hinted at this a few times, but why does it seem to me like there might be some other discomfort? Are they just talking about the nose, or are they also saying other things that generally make you feel bad?

7

Aesthetic decisions should actually be one of the most personal decisions a person can make. It’s normal for your partner to share their opinion, but if it turns into pressure that makes you unhappy, it’s important to stop and think. And remember, these kinds of procedures also require psychological preparation. If you’re considering it, it’s important to consult a specialist first and ask about your feelings here.

8

Let me add that my spouse is generally a supportive person, but they have really taken it to a different level on this issue. I don’t know if they were affected by an outside comment or if they always thought this way. That’s why I’m a bit more confused.

9

I think this situation stems directly from the balance of power. Your nose, your body. It might be your partner’s opinion, but if it’s something that needs to be done for you, you should completely make that decision yourself. Forcing it by saying ‘it would be better for you’ would be another type of control mechanism.

10

I understand how much it hurts to be hinted at a few times. The thought of ‘am I really that bad?’ keeps revolving in your mind. But if this thought keeps entering and leaving your mind constantly, it might be time to put a stop to it. First, it’s important to find the source that triggers this thought.