It’s been three years since we got married, and at first, everything was perfect, but for the last year, my spouse goes straight to their room and starts playing games as soon as they get home. They don’t sit at the dinner table or greet me. It’s like we’re complete strangers. I’ve tried to talk about it, but they just say, ‘I’m relieving work stress,’ and change the subject. Do you think this is normal, or is there a problem between us?
6 Answers
6Yeah, I think this is pretty common, especially after the pandemic, people seem to have disconnected from social bonds a bit. My partner was similar for a while, they were immersed in their phone instead of playing games. To be honest, this situation normalizes not talking after a while. I think don’t panic right away, but don’t stop talking.
Marriage is about living together and sharing life. What you’re saying isn’t normal at all, I’m sorry. Our elders used to pay a lot of attention to household order for this reason. Maybe you’re being too permissive, it shouldn’t be too loose.
Okay, but why are you acting like it’s taking you so long? Have you ever told your spouse, ‘I can’t accept this’? Or are you always the one who tries to keep things together, taking the softer approach? 
@ikidoktakalsa I actually said it, we discussed it but it lasts very briefly. He is immediately drawn into the room. At one point, I didn’t want to make it a bigger issue because it might get worse, but this is how it continues.
I don’t think we should normalize it that much. Sure, there can be stress and such, but this level of disconnect at home isn’t healthy. They’ve practically become neighbors, but roommates would at least talk more.
Your partner seems to be struggling to cope with work-related stress. Don’t give up on open communication, but if you’re not getting results, consider seeking support from a family therapist. Playing games may be an escape or a way to distract, but such a significant lack of communication isn’t sustainable in any relationship.