My flatmate ate my chocolate and left the trash open for no reason. I checked because there was a smell in the kitchen, and the trash isn’t even like how I placed it. When I mentioned it, they said, ‘You had chocolate, don’t exaggerate, what’s the big deal with the trash?’ Do you think this is normal? Do we really have to keep discussing these things?
7 Answers
7I had a similar situation too, my roommate was constantly taking my food. I had to speak openly about it, but the process was troublesome; sometimes you expect understanding from people, but it just doesn’t happen. I think you should talk frankly, because these types of things grow otherwise. ![]()
Well, I’m skipping this trash issue, but didn’t they really ask when taking the chocolate? I mean, you’re already there, in the same house; it shouldn’t be that hard to ask, right?
@kivilcim13 At first, when I said I noticed it, he admitted he didn’t ask. I got angry about the chocolate, but what really annoyed me was the trash situation because I had to clean up the smell.
@ozlem444 yeah, but this seems a bit exaggerated. okay, the thing taken might be special, but in the end, it’s a garbage issue, and looking at it from a friend’s perspective, it feels like a strange reaction. isn’t solidarity needed among roommates after all? ![]()
Such problems are actually more common in places where the concepts of personal space and shared space are not clearly defined, especially if communication is lacking. I think the main issue here is not so much about chocolate or garbage, but rather the lack of defined boundaries. At the beginning, a system needs to be established where everyone agrees on the rules; otherwise, there will be ongoing tension.
If I were in that position, I wouldn’t bother so much. If they’ve already taken my chocolate then there’s no respect, and if they’re leaving the trash open, they have no responsibility. If I’m continuing to live with someone like that, it’s my own fault. These things won’t change just by talking about them. ![]()
@ata_can solidarity and all that is nice, but if they’re messing with your stuff, what kind of solidarity is that? That chocolate is for today; tomorrow they’ll take something else without permission. There are no boundaries left, that’s where the problem starts ![]()