I have a roommate, and we generally get along well, but lately they’re acting a bit strange. They’re literally holding concerts in the shower, sometimes they don’t come out for like half an hour. At first, it was funny, but as it keeps going on, I’ve started to find it odd. I’m beginning to wonder if this is normal or if there’s some kind of problem. Do you think I should talk to them, or am I overreacting?
I think it’s a pretty normal thing. My old roommate was like that too, he would turn into a pop star in the shower. I found it weird at first, but then I realized that the shower was his relaxation space. Your roommate is probably in the same mindset, I wouldn’t overthink it.
So, okay, the shower is his space, but you do share a home after all. Could it be that extending this and being loud is infringing on your space? It’s important to maintain your boundaries; you can express this softly towards the behavior rather than the person.
I want to say something, but don’t misunderstand me; is this shower thing just an excuse? I mean, maybe he’s avoiding something else. A shower that long is not really normal, and when he says, ‘I’m just relaxing,’ it sounds a bit like a story. Could he be suppressing something?
Long showers and singing can be a method of relaxation, but they may also be linked to stress or anxiety disorders. Especially if someone is feeling a change or pressure in their life, this could be a sign. Of course, if it’s causing discomfort, it can be addressed in a suitable manner, but it would be more beneficial to approach the situation without jumping to conclusions.
Let me add this: The other day I asked, ‘Why are you staying in so long?’ I was curious if there was something serious going on, and the answer was, ‘The hot water calms me down; I feel better when I get out.’ It seems strange to me, but it might be masking something.
Probably a stress or a leisure habit. But if you’re uncomfortable, I think you should be clear without saying things like “freedom space” etc. You can talk about a duration like “let’s not go over half an hour.” Otherwise, this issue will keep dragging on 