My sister is bringing her boyfriend home, but my mom doesn’t know about it. I know what’s going on between them, but my mom doesn’t want me to say anything unless she asks. This situation bothers me, and I’m trying to understand, but I don’t really know what to do.
Well, my brother used to do this too. For a while, he would constantly bring his girlfriend home but kept it a secret from my mom. I told my mom once, and it was like the end of the world. You guys have a tough job.
How old is your sister? And why are they meeting at home, for example; don’t they have other options?
@iki_dakika is 19 years old. Her boyfriend is about the same age, and they’ve talked about going somewhere else, but it seems like they are struggling financially. That’s why they are hanging out at home.
@yazkenari but did you really do well by telling your grandmother? I think this could lead to even more chaos within the family. It seems more reasonable to talk a bit with your sister.
it seems like the main issue here is the mother being unaware of the situation. Even if the relationships are healthy, your mother might react when she finds out, which can affect the peace in the house. I suggest you sit down and talk openly with your sister; after all, there is a certain order in the house.
We recently experienced the same issue with a friend, and I think these matters are very sensitive. You should consider involving the family as a last resort; first, try to resolve the matter.
I think there’s a problem.
I think the bigger issue is the hiding. I mean, if your mom finds out one day, she might say, “Why didn’t you tell me from the beginning?” You don’t need to look guilty, have a serious talk with your sister; this will blow up in the long run.
If a sister is hosting someone at home, everyone in that house should consent to it. No one can use the common area just for their own pleasure. If the mother reacts when she finds out, I don’t think she’s being unreasonable; after all, it’s her authority in the house. If their financial situation is an excuse, they should sit down and sort it out themselves; they shouldn’t dump this on the family.