My partner keeps making jokes about my nose, saying things like, “You’d look so much better if you got it done.” Honestly, I’ve been obsessed with my nose since I was a kid, but I’ve never seriously considered surgery. Now, feeling pressured to change just because of this is bothering me a bit. Do you think this is healthy? How should I bring this up?
I also went through a similar situation; my ex kept saying, ‘If you got your chin done, your face would be more proportional.’ At first, I didn’t pay much attention to it, but then I noticed this topic kept coming up, so I inevitably started to lose interest. I mean, I think you should first reflect on how serious you are about this issue internally. It’s not something to act on right now; it will always linger in your mind later.
Let me speak frankly now; your partner may be insistent, but could it be that you have shown your obsessions to them from the beginning? I mean, since it has been on your mind since a young age, perhaps they think they are being “supportive”. Especially if they say it directly to your face, I think you should clearly say “I don’t want this” instead of being sensitive about it.
Cosmetic surgeries should be entirely up to the individual’s own desire. Changes made for someone else can create a psychological burden in the long run. If the nose does not affect respiration or has no health-related issues, it is recommended to consult with a specialist in processes that are initiated solely out of aesthetic concerns.
Let me also add that my partner isn’t saying this with bad intentions. I mean, there’s no mockery involved; it’s more like ‘if we could fix this too’ mode. But still, when they come at me this strong, I feel insecure, it’s not that they don’t want me, but it feels like I’m not enough.
Honey, things don’t work out with just the words from the other side. If you were my daughter, I would say, ‘No matter how perfect you are, I’ll still think twice about entering the same house with you!’ What difference does it make if you fix your nose? Tomorrow he might find something else about you that he doesn’t like. Believe in yourself, be with someone who truly loves you.