My partner joked the other day, âYou should cut back on sweets a little, huh?â But I didnât find it funny at all; honestly, it brought me down. On one hand, I know Iâve gained weight, but on the other hand, does he really have the right to warn me like that? Iâm undecided. Should I react or should I think about it more?
8 Answers
8I went through the same thing; my ex used to constantly nag me about giving up sweets. I laughed at first, but in the end, I felt bad. Finally, I spoke openly and drew the line, and he never brought it up again. I think you need to express how you feel clearly.
I think the issue here goes beyond just weight; itâs important to know the line between honesty and overstepping boundaries. Whether you gain or lose weight is entirely up to you. The person you call your partner cannot shift into âwarningâ mode about your body without your consent. Such âjokesâ made without your permission are clearly overstepping.
Let me be honest with you, my girl, I donât know if youâve gained weight, but things like this can break a personâs heart. Maybe the guy was just trying to do something good in his own way, but you canât solve these issues by making jokes about them. You need to talk it out properly and set your boundaries. You should be able to say, âIf you love me this way, then fine, but otherwise, Iâll do what I know.â
It might seem a bit strange now, but I think you might have blown the reaction out of proportion. After all, you noticed that you gained weight too. You might not like it, but maybe they said it because they really care about you. Perhaps they are trying to talk to you openly. It would have been better if you had listened without judging directly.
Itâs important to distinguish two things here. If your partner is constantly commenting on your body, even as a joke, it can damage your self-esteem over time. However, communication is also important in relationships. You may have health risks related to your weight gain. So, perhaps discussing with a dietitian to understand your physical condition could be a good start.
I should add that my partner is generally very thoughtful. But it feels like they acted a bit clumsily in this matter. I actually hesitated to talk to them because itâs a sensitive topic. On one hand, I wonder if theyâre right, but I didnât like this approach. 
Exactly, when a person hears such a comment, they keep mulling it over in their mind all day. While getting dressed and looking in the mirror or just sitting there, you keep thinking, âI wonder if itâs noticeable.â This not only affects your morale but also undermines your self-confidence. I suggest you take a moment to pause and really assess how you feel.
These kinds of issues are a bit sensitive, you know? Your partner might be thinking of you, but their approach is wrong. If your weight gain is affecting your health (for example, if youâre experiencing shortness of breath or increased fatigue), then itâs necessary to talk to a health professional. But to say such things just for appearanceâs sake is really not nice.